Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Your friend has an opportunity to study in one of the following two types of majors. Which one do you think is better? a. To complete his or her studies and get a job faster b. To study in a major that requires many years of studying but one which would l v.2

Your friend has an opportunity to study in one of the following two types of majors. Which one do you think is better? a. To complete his or her studies and get a job faster b. To study in a major that requires many years of studying but one which would l v. 2
Career outlook is one of the most significant aspects of a university major considered by students who are contemplating about what field to enroll in. Pertain to this, it can be concluded that majors which guarantee a prosperous future of wealth and social status are more prevalent among students. But the problem with most of these majors is that they require more years to pass the courses necessary before one can take on a job relevant to the field. In that regard, another important aspect students weigh out before deciding on a field of study, is the number of years needed to spend in class before they can attain a degree. This can put many students on the verge of a crossroad – should they start a field which enables them to embark on a job in a shorter period of time, or should they wait out the longer years required to get a degree in a major with a more prosperous career outlook? Many factors should be considered upon making this significant, life-altering decision; current status economically, personal interest, life goals, etc. Evidently, the most suitable decision will vary from one individual to another, each followed by a string of advantages and disadvantages. However, I would strongly advise new students to embark on a field that would guarantee them a more sumptuous future, even if this major requires prolonged study courses. When making significant choices in life, every person should consider the short-term and long-term consequences that decision will have. Although some choices might lead to desired outcomes in the short-run, they might not be the most appropriate decision in the span of the years. It is quite usual for some students to be tantalized by job opportunities present for them early on, but they should contemplate if that job can take them where they want to be in twenty or thirty years. Or if the job available will ensure them of the life they want in the future. Many of the job opportunities that appear in the early years for a student are dead-end jobs with minimum prosper and room to improve. Whereas, if students persistently await the hard years of studying and not give to the tempting job opportunities, they will have many better, sophisticated and more appropriate employment options laid out before them – opportunities with room for promotion, prosper, social class and wealth. An immediate example that comes to mind is medical school. Many student are frightened by the long, arduous years of study that is mandatory for a medical degree; thus a small portion will be motivated to strive throughout the years. But in the long run, it is evident that the persons who take the high-road and patiently thrive through the years are awarded with employment opportunities of high social class and wealth. In my own experience, I have seen quite a large number of remorseful people who took the easy road to earlier employment, wishing they had had the patience and persistence to choose the other path. As mentioned before, I believe that ultimately the most suitable course of action is different for each individual. Some students might not have the persistence required in a major necessitating more courses. Or they might not have the economical stand that will assist them through the years of study required, thus pushing them in a direction ensued by early employment. In other words, although it is obvious that a major guaranteeing more sophisticated employment opportunities is the ideal course of action, not everyone has the freedom to make that decision. Thus, the pros and cons of each course of action should be weighed out against ones current status in life. To conclude, deciding on a university major is one the most significant choices in life and employment outlook is perhaps one of the most important factors one should consider upon embarking on a field of study. Although the most suited decision between a major ensued by early employment opportunities or a field requiring longer years of study, but higher employments options is different for each individual, I believe taking the harder road and persisting through longer of study is more rewarding in the long run.
Career outlook is one of the most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
significant
aspects of a university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
major
considered by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
who are contemplating about what
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
field
to enroll in. Pertain to this, it can
be concluded
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
majors
which guarantee a prosperous future of wealth and social status are more prevalent among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
the problem with most of these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
majors
is that they require more years to pass the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
courses
necessary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
before
one can take on a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
relevant to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
field
. In that regard, another
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
aspect
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
weigh out
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
before
deciding on a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
field
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
, is the number of years needed to spend in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
before
they can attain a degree. This can put
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
on the verge of a crossroad
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
–
should they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
field
which enables them to embark on a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
in a shorter period of time, or should they wait out the longer years required to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a degree in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
major
with a more prosperous career outlook?
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
factors should
be considered
upon making this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
significant
, life-altering
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
decision
;
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
status
economically
, personal interest,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
goals, etc.
Evidently
, the most suitable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
decision
will vary from one individual to another, each followed by a string of advantages and disadvantages.
However
, I would
strongly
advise new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to embark on a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
field
that would guarantee them a more sumptuous future, even if this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
major
requires prolonged
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
courses.

When making
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
significant
choices in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
, every person should consider the short-term and long-term consequences that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
decision
will have. Although
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
choices
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
lead to desired outcomes in the short-run, they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
not be the most appropriate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
decision
in the span of the years. It is quite usual for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to
be tantalized
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opportunities
present for them
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
early
on,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they should contemplate if that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
can take them where they want to be in twenty or thirty years. Or if the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
available will ensure them of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
they want in the future.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opportunities
that appear in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
early
years for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
are dead-
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
with minimum prosper and room to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
. Whereas, if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
persistently
await the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
years of studying and not give to the tempting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opportunities
, they will have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
better, sophisticated and more appropriate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employment
options laid out
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
before
them
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
–
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opportunities
with room for promotion, prosper, social
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
and wealth.

An immediate example that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to mind is medical school.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
You should probably use "is".
are
frightened by the long, arduous years of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
that is
mandatory for a medical degree;
thus
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
portion will
be motivated
to strive throughout the years.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
in the long run, it is evident that the persons who take the high-road and
patiently
thrive through the years
are awarded
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employment
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opportunities
of high social
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
and wealth. In my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
experience, I have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
quite
Specify a number, remove phrase, or simply use "many" or "numerous"
a large number of
remorseful
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who took the easy road to earlier
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employment
, wishing they had had the patience and persistence to choose the other path.

As mentioned
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
before
, I believe that
ultimately
the most suitable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
course
of action is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
for each individual.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
not have the persistence required in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
major
necessitating more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
courses
. Or they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
not have the economical stand that will assist them through the years of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
required,
thus
pushing them in a direction ensued by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
early
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employment
.
In other words
, although it is obvious that a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
major
guaranteeing more sophisticated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employment
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opportunities
is the ideal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
course
of action, not everyone has the freedom to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
decision
.
Thus
, the pros and cons of each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
course
of action should
be weighed
out against ones
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
status in life.

To conclude
, deciding on a university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
major
is
Did you mean "one of"?
one
the most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
significant
choices in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employment
outlook is perhaps one of the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
factors one should consider upon embarking on a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
field
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
. Although the most suited
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
decision
between a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
major
ensued by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
early
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employment
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opportunities
or a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
field
requiring longer years of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
higher
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employments
options is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
for each individual, I believe taking the harder road and persisting through longer of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
is more rewarding in the long run.
11Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
88Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Mistakes

IELTS essay Your friend has an opportunity to study in one of the following two types of majors. Which one do you think is better? a. To complete his or her studies and get a job faster b. To study in a major that requires many years of studying but one which would l v. 2

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
700 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts