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Your first day of school is tomorrow. What materials and supplies are necessary for the first day of class and why? v.1

Your first day of school is tomorrow. What materials and supplies are necessary for the first day of class and why? v. 1
Nowadays, people travel to and fro to explore different cultures and traditions of other nations. When tourists visit any city, they talk in the English language. While some people believe that it will make English the only language of communication, as such, having a single language has both merits and demerits. There are two main advantages of having one global language, easy to communicate and it boosts the economy of the nation. When tourists travel to another country, they interact with local people easily if there is one language spoken globally. For example, travellers gain knowledge of local history, since English is spoken all around the world. Moreover, becomes easy for them to stay there for a longer period. Another reason is that single removes all the barriers of communication, so, two nations can easily trade with each other. Thus, it will boost the economy of the country. Besides, some people, including myself, think that it will diminish all other local languages. With the vanish of regional languages, local culture and history also die. Furthermore, there will be no point in visiting other nations when there is no difference between cultures. Hence, people will not visit any region and eventually, the tourism industry will die. For instance, nowadays, nobody knows the ancient encryptions, so it becomes difficult to understand their tradition and ethical values. To conclude, while there are benefits of having one global language, tourists can communicate efficiently with residents, while, it will be at the cost of regional cultural and traditional values. In my opinion, maintaining local languages and cultures should be prioritized to ensure a rich world heritage for future generations.
Nowadays,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
travel to and fro to explore
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultures
and traditions of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
. When tourists visit any city, they talk in the English
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that it will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
English the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
of communication, as such, having a single
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
has both merits and demerits.

There are two main advantages of having one global
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
, easy to communicate and it boosts the economy of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
. When tourists travel to another country, they interact with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
easily
if there is one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
spoken globally.
For example
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
travellers
gain knowledge of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
history, since English
is spoken
all around the world.
Moreover
, becomes easy for them to stay there for a longer period. Another reason is that single removes all the barriers of communication,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
, two
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
can
easily
trade with each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
.
Thus
, it will boost the economy of the country.

Besides
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, including myself,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that it will diminish all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
. With
After 'the', do not use a verb. Make sure that the spelling of 'vanish' is correct. If 'vanish' is the first word in a compound adjective, use a hyphen between the two words. Note: This error message can occur if you use a verb as a noun, and the word is not a noun in standard English.
the vanish
of regional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
and history
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
die
.
Furthermore
, there will be no point in visiting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
when there is no difference between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultures
.
Hence
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will not visit any region and
eventually
, the tourism industry will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
die
.
For instance
, nowadays, nobody knows the ancient
Possible spelling mistake found.
encryptions
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it becomes difficult to understand their tradition and ethical values.

To conclude
, while there are benefits of having one global
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
, tourists can communicate
efficiently
with residents, while, it will be at the cost of regional cultural and traditional values. In my opinion, maintaining
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultures
should
be prioritized
to ensure a rich world heritage for future generations.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Your first day of school is tomorrow. What materials and supplies are necessary for the first day of class and why? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
274 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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