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Young people prefer listening to music rather than listening to the news on the radio. Is this positive or a negative trend. provide reasons and examples for your opinion? v.2

Young people prefer listening to music rather than listening to the news on the radio. Is this positive or a negative trend. provide reasons and examples for your opinion? v. 2
Although some people believe giving presents is an important way to display the care for family and friends, while others have different opinions for showing care and love using alternate methods. In this essay, we are going to discuss both the views and will give my opinion towards the conclusion. Gifts are priceless, you can't associate money with the gift as it has emotions attached to it. Some people believe that giving expensive present is important than the usefulness of the gift for the recipient. It is highly important while choosing the item, you consider the need and quality of the product, that can bring some change in the person's life and give them the way to remember you because of the gift. For Example, choosing an expensive watch than a smart watch or health band. Although it is also a good way to show that you care and depict the importance of them in your life. There are many other ways as well to show you care and love, such as, spending quality time with the family members, helping the friend in need which could be as simple as guidance on particular subjects. For example, you might spend a lot of time in your business, work or studies and your friend and family members are looking for some ways to talk and enjoy with you. I believe it is more important to spend quality time with family and friends, providing help and support wherever required is more important than giving presents. In today's fast paced environment, it is more critical to spend time than providing the gifts to show you love. In conclusion, it depends on person to person, whether to give gifts or show affection in other important ways. But people tend to remember you more if you spend time and help them in need.
Although
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe giving presents is an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
way
to display the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
, while others have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
opinions for showing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
using alternate methods. In this essay, we are going to discuss both the views and will give my opinion towards the conclusion.

Gifts are priceless, you can't associate money with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gift
as it has emotions attached to it.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that giving expensive present is
Use "(important)" to make a comparison with this adjective.
important
than the usefulness of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gift
for the recipient. It is
highly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
while choosing the item, you consider the need and quality of the product, that can bring
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
in the person's life and give them the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
way
to remember you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gift
.
For Example
, choosing an expensive
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
than a smart
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
or health band. Although it is
also
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
way
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
show
that you
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
and depict the importance of them in your life.

There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ways
as well
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
show
you
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
, such as, spending quality
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
members, helping the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friend
in need which could be as simple as guidance on particular subjects.
For example
, you might
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
in your business, work or studies and your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friend
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
members are looking for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ways
to talk and enjoy with you.

I believe it is more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
quality
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
, providing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
and support wherever required is more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
than giving presents. In
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
's
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
paced environment, it is more critical to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
than providing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gifts
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
show
you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
.

In conclusion
, it depends on person to person, whether to give
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gifts
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
show
affection in other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ways
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
tend to remember you more if you
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them in need.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
Change your language and you change your thoughts.
Karl Albrecht

IELTS essay Young people prefer listening to music rather than listening to the news on the radio. Is this positive or a negative trend. provide reasons and examples for your opinion? v. 2

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
307 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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