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Young people are much more aware of and concerned about issues like the environment, poverty and animal welfare than the previous generation. What is your own opinion? v.2

Young people are much more aware of and concerned about issues like the environment, poverty and animal welfare than the previous generation. What is your own opinion? v. 2
People have different views about how considerate are young individuals about their environment, poverty and animal. While there are some positive arguments in favor of their awareness about the universe, I believe that older generation was more responsible and aware about the natural resources and habitats as oppose to youngsters. There are several reasons why I argue that previous generation was more concerned about their environment and society. Firstly, our ancestors used to live much simpler and they tried not to ruin the wild life and natural inhabitants by making waste and destroying the nature. Secondly, they mainly fed of organic vegetables, nuts and fruits and there was not any genetically modified food which can contaminate the neighbor crops with unknown effects on the nature. Finally, Government authorities try to provide all the residents with health and education by taxing working people but now they spend large amount of money on space investigations which are vanity projects for politicians. To prove my claim, I can refer to an article having been published in Time magazine, indicates that social welfare decreased almost 30% in developed countries during the last 10 years. On the other hand, Young generation does lots of constructions and makes various types of roads and buildings that bring about an excessive amount of destructions in nature and green areas. Besides, they use the natural resources lavishly without any consideration about the consequences of this trend. Take water resources for example, the next generation will face severe problems in the future as a result of water shortage. Furthermore, by producing more waste and litter and contaminating oceans, seas and jungles, they become a serious threat for the environment. Consequently all of these behaviors will lead to intricate problems such as endangered species of plants and animals. To sum up, although young fellows could access achievements in various fields of science and technology, they had some detrimental effects on the environment, animals and the like.
People
have
different
views about how considerate are young individuals about their
environment
, poverty and animal. While there are
some
positive
arguments in favor of their awareness about the universe, I believe that older generation was more responsible and aware about the natural resources and habitats
as oppose to
youngsters.

There are several reasons why I argue that previous generation was more concerned about their
environment
and society.
Firstly
, our ancestors
used
to
live
much
simpler and
they tried not to ruin the wild life and natural inhabitants by making waste and destroying the nature.
Secondly
, they
mainly
fed of organic vegetables, nuts and fruits and there was not any
genetically
modified food which can contaminate the neighbor crops with unknown effects on the nature.
Finally
,
Government
authorities try to provide all the residents with health and education by taxing working
people
but
now
they spend large amount of money on space investigations which are vanity projects for politicians. To prove my claim, I can refer to an article having
been published
in Time magazine, indicates that social welfare decreased almost 30% in
developed countries
during the last 10 years.

On the other hand
, Young generation does lots of constructions and
makes
various types of roads and buildings that bring about an excessive amount of
destructions
in nature and green areas.
Besides
, they
use
the natural resources
lavishly
without any consideration about the consequences of this trend. Take water resources
for example
, the
next
generation will face severe problems in the future
as a result
of water shortage.
Furthermore
, by producing more waste and litter and contaminating oceans, seas and jungles, they become a serious threat for the
environment
.
Consequently
all of these behaviors will lead to intricate problems such as endangered species of plants and animals.

To sum up, although young fellows could access achievements in various fields of science and technology, they had
some
detrimental effects on the
environment
, animals and the like.
11Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes

IELTS essay Young people are much more aware of and concerned about issues like the environment, poverty and animal welfare than the previous generation. What is your own opinion? v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
325 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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