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Young drivers are careless and overconfident, and too many are killed in accidents. To eliminate this problem, we could teach children the skills of safe driving while they are at schools. v.1

Young drivers are careless and overconfident, and too many are killed in accidents. To eliminate this problem, we could teach children the skills of safe driving while they are at schools. v. 1
It is becoming increasingly difficult to ignore the significance of road accidents and associated loss of life on the roads, especially due to rash and reckless driving by youngsters. It is clear that the number of accidents can be prevented with awareness programs so I am of the opinion that, these programs must be started at school level itself. To commence with, an army people assert that, schools are the place where one gets basic knowledge about rules and regulations that we need to implement in his social life. More importantly, people do not forget what they learn at their younger ages. To exemplify, people hardly forget geometric calculations and fundamental history of their nation. In my opinion, if they learn the necessity of safe driving with these basic subjects it will be a boon for the safety of themselves as well as for the society. Furthermore, young age is the age of energy, overconfidence and enthusiasm, it is quite necessary to control these emotions to some extent to reduce the number of mishaps. Unless they understand the detrimental effects of accidents, they would control their way of driving. Education is the only way to make them understand the consequences of accidents. On the contrary, pupils are already overloaded their curriculum with many important subjects, it is unwise to ask them to learn this subject. In addition to this, mandatory age to learn driving is 18, since they do not know learning when they are at school; it is a foolishness to ask them about the negative side of over speed and related problems. To conclude, today thousands and thousands of accidents are happening every hour around the world. The government and authorities have tried several measures to tackle this issue. In my opinion, a school is a fundamental place to start teaching about avoiding reckless driving.
It is becoming
increasingly
difficult to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ignore
the significance of road
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
accidents
and associated loss of life on the roads,
especially
due to rash and reckless
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
driving
by youngsters. It is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
accidents
can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevented
with awareness programs
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
I am of the opinion that, these programs
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
level itself.

To commence with, an army
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
assert that,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
are the place where one
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
gets
basic knowledge about
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
and regulations that we need to implement in his social life. More
importantly
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
do not forget what they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
at their younger
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ages
. To exemplify,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
hardly forget geometric calculations and fundamental history of their nation. In my opinion, if they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
the necessity of safe
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
driving
with these basic subjects it will be a boon for the safety of themselves
as well
as for the society.

Furthermore
, young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
is the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
of energy, overconfidence and enthusiasm, it is quite necessary to control these emotions to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
extent to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the number of mishaps. Unless they understand the detrimental effects of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
accidents
, they would control their way of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
driving
. Education is the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them understand the consequences of accidents.

On the contrary
, pupils are already overloaded their curriculum with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
subjects, it is unwise to ask them to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
this subject.
In addition
to this, mandatory
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
driving
is 18, since they do not know learning when they are at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
; it is a foolishness to ask them about the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
side of over speed and related problems.

To conclude
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
thousands and thousands of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
accidents
are happening every hour around the world. The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
and authorities have tried several measures to tackle this issue. In my opinion, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
is a fundamental place to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
teaching about avoiding reckless
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
driving
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
21Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay Young drivers are careless and overconfident, and too many are killed in accidents. To eliminate this problem, we could teach children the skills of safe driving while they are at schools. v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
307 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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