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You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. In some countries, governments are encouraging people to use their cars less and to take public transport instead. Do the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and i v.61

In some countries, governments are encouraging people to use their cars less and to take public transport instead. Do the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages? 61
There are many government initiatives across the world to control the environmental pollution and one of such initiatives is promotion of public transportation. In my opinion, such efforts do not have many advantages and in fact, its shortcomings are much more than few benefits that we may have. First of all, the advantages of encouraging the use of public transportation are less consumption of fossil fuels and congestion on the road. However, these positives consequences are negligible if a comparison is made between merits and demerits of public transportation. If people stop using their cars and taxis, then, there will be enormous pressure on the government to provide public transportations such as buses, metros and trams. This will certainly put a financial pressure on the government. There is a possibility that the government may be compelled to allocate fewer budgets on health and education, and more on transportation segment. Such scenario will have serious and deleterious consequences. Another serious outcome of not using cars is that workers have to get up early, and leave home much early in the morning to catch the suitable means of transport to reach the office on time. This will disturb the normal day of every human resources. Since public vehicles will stop at multiple locations before reaching one’s destination, a lot of man hours are wasted while commuting from home and from work. Similar would be the case when an employee returns from work in the evening. Since the travelling with many large crowds creates fatigue, the quality of works also gets affected due to it. In my conclusion, I would like to state that any benefit that may accrue from the use of public transportation is likely to be insignificant as the disadvantages are too many to neglect.
There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
initiatives across the world to control the environmental pollution and one of such initiatives is promotion of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
. In my opinion, such efforts do not have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
advantages and in fact, its shortcomings are much more than few benefits that we may have.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, the advantages of encouraging the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
are less consumption of fossil fuels and congestion on the road.
However
, these positives consequences are negligible if a comparison
is made
between merits and demerits of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
. If
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
using their cars and taxis, then, there will be enormous pressure on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
to provide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportations
such as buses, metros and trams. This will
certainly
put a financial pressure on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
. There is a possibility that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
may
be compelled
to allocate fewer budgets on health and education, and more on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
segment. Such scenario will have serious and deleterious consequences.

Another serious outcome of not using cars is that workers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
up early, and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
home much early in the morning to catch the suitable means of transport to reach the office on time. This will disturb the normal day of every human resources. Since
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
vehicles will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
at multiple locations
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
reaching one’s destination,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
man hours
are wasted
while commuting from home and from work. Similar would be the case when an employee returns from work in the evening. Since the travelling with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
large crowds creates fatigue, the quality of works
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
gets
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
due to it.

In my conclusion, I would like to state that any benefit that may accrue from the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
is likely to be insignificant as the disadvantages are too
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
to neglect.
3Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
16Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay In some countries, governments are encouraging people to use their cars less and to take public transport instead. Do the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages? 61

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
295 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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