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You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Wealth does not necessarily guaranty happiness. To what extent do you agree with this statement? Provide reasons for your answer. Include relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words. v.5

Wealth does not necessarily guaranty happiness. Provide reasons for your answer. Include relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. v. 5
Having a great deal of riches does not mean a whole contentment in the life. In my opinion, I completely agree with this view because there are several other factors like better health and self satisfaction which are really crucial for a human being to be happy. One of the main reasons why happiness depends upon numerous other factors is that the masses cannot enjoy luxuries without being perfectly healthy. As a matter of fact, sometimes being fit becomes more important than being a wealthy individual. For instance, if the sugar level of a diabetic patient is high, if will not be able to consume his favourite sugary sweets, even they are affordable. Another obvious reason is that the meaning of being happy varies from a person to person. In fact, individuals have their own priorities and goals for which they struggle to achieve contentment. For example, if gaining a top position in the class is the priority for a majority of the students than marriage is a goal of life for a bachelor person, for which they push themselves hard. In conclusion, although having a huge mount of cash in the pocket definitely give a great deal of opportunities to purchase a variety of things, i believe that obtaining a career goal and living a healthy life are indispensable factors for having satisfactory feelings. In conclusion, although having a huge mount of cash in the pocket definitely give a great deal of opportunities to purchase a variety of things, i believe that obtaining a career goal and living a healthy life are indispensable factors for having satisfactory feelings.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Having
a great deal of riches does not mean a whole contentment in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. In my opinion, I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this view
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
there are several other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
factors
like better health and
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
self satisfaction
which are
really
crucial for a human being to be happy.

One of the main reasons why happiness depends upon numerous other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
factors
is that the masses cannot enjoy luxuries without being
perfectly
healthy. As a matter of fact,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
being fit
becomes more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
than being a wealthy individual.
For instance
, if the sugar level of a diabetic patient is high, if will not be able to consume his
Possible spelling mistake. 'favourite' is British English.
favourite
sugary sweets, even they are affordable.

Another obvious reason is that the meaning of being happy varies from a person to person. In fact, individuals have their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
priorities and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
goals
for which they struggle to achieve contentment.
For example
, if gaining a top position in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
is the priority for a majority of the students than marriage is a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
goal
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
for a bachelor person, for which they push themselves
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
.
In conclusion
, although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
a huge mount of cash in the pocket definitely give a great deal of opportunities to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
a variety of things,
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
believe that obtaining a career
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
goal
and living a healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
are indispensable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
factors
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
satisfactory feelings.

In conclusion
, although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
a huge mount of cash in the pocket definitely give a great deal of opportunities to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
a variety of things,
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
believe that obtaining a career
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
goal
and living a healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
are indispensable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
factors
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
satisfactory feelings.
4Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
17Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes
A special kind of beauty exists which is born in language, of language, and for language.
Gaston Bachelard

IELTS essay Wealth does not necessarily guaranty happiness. Provide reasons for your answer. Include relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. v. 5

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
269 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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