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You should spend about 20 minutes on this Task. The first graph below shows the weight (in tonnes) of fruit produced by a farm during each month in2013, and also the amount (in tonnes) of fertiliser used. The second graph shows the volume ofrainfall in eac v.12

The first graph below shows the weight (in tonnes) of fruit produced by a farm during each month in2013, and also the amount (in tonnes) of fertiliser used. The second graph shows the volume ofrainfall in eac v. 12
In today’s consumer world, there is an opinion asserting that saving money is more advisable compared to simply splash it out. Having said that, I utterly agree with the given statement on the basis of some compelling reasons which will be discussed in detail. To begin with, one of the most rational justifications in support of this mindset is that we live in a fast-changing world which is full of unexpected events; to put it differently, it is an absolute necessity to have a reserve of funds in case of emergencies, including unemployment, illnesses or other crisis in some points in life. Furthermore, if there are no proper plans for managing earnings, not only are individuals bound to put themselves at risk of reckless spending, but worse, they are prone to lead a wildly extravagant lifestyle; for instance, by purchasing frivolous or unnecessary items particularly those luxurious ones while it might just give them some momentary pleasures. Lastly, those who tend to have a disciplined style of living and save regularly some amounts of their income, even if it is relatively insignificant, they are more likely to accumulate vast sums of money in long-run which in turn can be used to meet their targets, for example purchasing a car or property. It might be said that people make money to enjoy a better life and make the most of every moment of their lives. Despite this, it seems that for many people, these pleasures are momentary and outweighed by issues, such as becoming stuck in deep financial problems. To conclude, saving money offers a great number of advantages, ranging from avoiding excessive sending to fulfilling our long-term goals which are achievable through proper saving scheme.
In
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
’s consumer world, there is an opinion asserting that saving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
is more advisable compared to
simply
splash it out. Having said that, I
utterly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
statement on the basis of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
compelling reasons which will
be discussed
in detail.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, one of the most rational justifications in support of this mindset is that we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
-changing world which is full of unexpected
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
; to put it
differently
, it is an absolute necessity to have a reserve of funds in case of emergencies, including unemployment, illnesses or other crisis in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
points in life.
Furthermore
, if there are no proper plans for managing earnings, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
are individuals bound to put themselves at
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
of reckless spending,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
worse, they are prone to lead a
wildly
extravagant lifestyle;
for instance
, by purchasing frivolous or unnecessary items
particularly
those luxurious ones while it might
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
give them
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
momentary pleasures.
Lastly
, those who tend to have a disciplined style of living and save
regularly
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
amounts of their income, even if it is
relatively
insignificant, they are more likely to accumulate vast sums of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
in long-run which in turn can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
their targets,
for example
purchasing a car or property.

It might
be said
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
to enjoy a better life and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the most of every moment of their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
. Despite this, it seems that for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
, these pleasures are momentary and outweighed by issues, such as becoming stuck in deep financial problems.

To conclude
, saving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
offers a great number of advantages, ranging from avoiding excessive sending to fulfilling our long-term goals which are achievable through proper saving scheme.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay The first graph below shows the weight (in tonnes) of fruit produced by a farm during each month in2013, and also the amount (in tonnes) of fertiliser used. The second graph shows the volume ofrainfall in eac v. 12

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
285 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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