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You see an advertisement for a course designed to help improve your memory. Write a letter to the organisers of the course. in lettergive some background information about yourselfexplain your own problems and why you would like to do the courseenquire ab v.1

You see an advertisement for a course designed to help improve your memory. Write a letter to the organisers of the course. in lettergive some background information about yourselfexplain your own problems and why you would like to do the courseenquire ab v. 1
It is indeed a fact that actors are making an income than politicians is an argumentative topic in society. Some people believe that politicians have more capacity for generating money. However, others opine that celebrities have uplifted their earning capacity and now there are leading the battle. According to my understanding, this is accepted due to various reasons. Firstly, when compared to the current situation of the word, it can be realized that politicians have no demand in society and people are not interested to believe them. Therefore, actors are more popular and getting more earning opportunities than general public representatives. According to the new research done by the University of California, it has been reported that due to current demand and the people’s interest, celebrities are getting more advantages in their businesses. Therefore, they have the capacity for generating more wealth than politicians. Secondly, since most actors are receiving invitations for overseas films and modelling shows. There are getting paid by Dollars. Therefore, income levels of the celebrities are increasing and this can help to improve the economy levels of the country. Due to these foreign incomes, the government has given lots of Tax benefits for them. This can be considered as the main reason for making more profit than politicians. According to the latest newspaper reported, shows the comparison of how quickly actors are generating money. Considering all the aspects of the above. It can be concluded that celebrities are earning more pay than politicians. And, also provide profits to the government, economy more effectively.
It is
indeed
a fact that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
actors
are making an income than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
politicians
is an argumentative topic in society.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
politicians
have more capacity for generating money.
However
, others opine that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrities
have uplifted their earning capacity and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
there are leading the battle. According to my understanding, this is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
accepted
due to various reasons.

Firstly
, when compared to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
situation of the word, it can
be realized
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
politicians
have no demand in society and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are not interested to believe them.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
actors
are more popular and getting more earning opportunities than
Consider using "public".
general public
representatives. According to the new research done by the University of California, it has
been reported
that due to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
demand and the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
’s interest,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrities
are getting more advantages in their businesses.
Therefore
, they have the capacity for generating more wealth than politicians.

Secondly
, since most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
actors
are receiving invitations for overseas films and modelling
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
. There are getting paid by Dollars.
Therefore
, income levels of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrities
are increasing and this can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the economy levels of the country. Due to these foreign incomes, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
lots of Tax benefits for them. This can
be considered
as the main reason for making more profit than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
politicians
. According to the latest newspaper reported,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
the comparison of how
quickly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
actors
are generating money.

Considering all the aspects of the above. It can
be concluded
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrities
are earning more pay than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
politicians
. And,
also
provide profits to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
, economy more
effectively
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay You see an advertisement for a course designed to help improve your memory. Write a letter to the organisers of the course. in lettergive some background information about yourselfexplain your own problems and why you would like to do the courseenquire ab v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
257 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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