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04/11/2017 You are going to another country to study. You would like to do a part-time job while you are studying, so you want to ask a freind who lives there for some help. Write a letter to this freind. In your lettergive details of your study planexplai v.1

04/11/2017 You are going to another country to study. You would like to do a part-time job while you are studying, so you want to ask a freind who lives there for some help. Write a letter to this freind. In your lettergive details of your study planexplai v. 1
Have you ever thought that incoming products from foreign countries is good for our economic growth or not? In my point of view, we should import things that we cannot produce by ourselves to satisfy people wants and needs. Nowadays, people trade things with money to get what they wants and needs to make them more comfortable and fulfil their heart with things that they love. So, people start to learn how to sell products and strategies to gain more profit as much as they can also the country. The government needs to increase the percentages of gross domestic product (GDP) to make the business in the country run well and get enough salary to pay an expenditure for the whole province. Supermarkets are the most centre that might help government to gain more money by include taxes to products that they sell because people spend their money for food or even the asset which is essential for their lives. Moreover, if we import products that customer wants and needs, but we cannot produce by ourselves, the taxes on incoming stock with a higher rate will make government has more income. Furthermore, people will spend their pay for things they want especially for limited products and brand name, what will come after is revolving funds in the country and has a very strong economy. For instance, fans of Gucci really want to update their accessaries and buy the limited one. On the other hand, it might be a bit disadvantages such as, when people spend too much on imports products and ignore or did not support our own product enough so they will lose their income but, if we promote and people cooperate, we can solve this problem. To conclude, import commodity will increase peoples' incomes and beneficial to the authority to earn more taxes. In my opinion, I think imports are more helpful to our economy than disadvantages and that is why I agree with this opinion.
Have you ever
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
that incoming
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
from foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
for our economic growth or not? In my point of view, we should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
import
things that we cannot produce by ourselves to satisfy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
wants
and needs.

Nowadays,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
trade things with money to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
what they
The pronoun 'they' must be used with a non-third-person form of a verb: "want"
wants
and needs to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them more comfortable and fulfil their heart with things that they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
to learn how to sell
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
and strategies to gain more profit as much as they can
also
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
. The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
needs to increase the percentages of gross domestic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
(GDP) to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the business in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
run well and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
salary to pay an expenditure for the whole province. Supermarkets are the most
Possible spelling mistake. 'centre' is British English.
centre
that might
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
to gain more money by include taxes to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
that they sell
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
spend their money for food or even the asset which is essential for their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.

Moreover
, if we
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
import
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
that customer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wants
and needs,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
we cannot produce by ourselves, the taxes on incoming stock with a higher rate will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
has more income.
Furthermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will spend their pay for things they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
want
especially
for limited
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
and brand name, what will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
after is revolving funds in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
and has a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
strong economy.
For instance
, fans of Gucci
really
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
want
to update their
Possible spelling mistake found.
accessaries
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
the limited one.

On the other hand
, it might be a
It seems that there's a missing preposition after ''.
bit
disadvantages such as, when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
spend too much on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
imports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ignore
or did not support our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they will lose their income
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
, if we promote and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
cooperate, we can solve this problem.

To conclude
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
import
commodity will increase peoples' incomes and beneficial to the authority to earn more taxes. In my opinion, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
imports
are more helpful to our economy than disadvantages and
that is
why I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this opinion.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay 04/11/2017 You are going to another country to study. You would like to do a part-time job while you are studying, so you want to ask a freind who lives there for some help. Write a letter to this freind. In your lettergive details of your study planexplai v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
328 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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