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You have received a letter from your university of Albion demanding a reason for your absencefrom an exam. You were ill that day, but failed to submit the evidence. Write a letter to theExaminations Committee explaining your situation. You should include: v.1

You have received a letter from your university of Albion demanding a reason for your absencefrom an exam. You were ill that day, but failed to submit the evidence. Write a letter to theExaminations Committee explaining your situation. You should include: v. 1
Few people believe that riding a bicycle within a city is better and 2% of them think that travelling through taxi is well within the local areas. This essay agrees with the use of two wheeled rather than using vehicles. Travelling through the cycle can reduce health issues in the car we can travel comfortably. First of all, now-a-days public are preferring four wheeler to travel within their colony. However, there are few concerns in terms of health, the whole family can go together to enjoy their free time. They can travel pleasantly without any problems. They can relax themselves by listening to music and many features which are designed into the vehicles. To the instance, I along with my family will go through the car. Despite of few difficulties, we can roam happily. On the other hand, most of the people use bicycles to go in their streets because it reduces the risks of heart stroke, increase in blood pressure, and sugar levels. Riding a pedal cycle can train the entire body physically and mentally, and keeps us healthy. The bike doesn't cost too much and it is free from pollution. For example, my uncle uses bike instead of fossil fuel vehicles. Till now he didn't suffer with any health query and he is more active compared to my family members. In conclusion, the fifty percentage of the population believes moving through vehicle will be fine, while others think two wheeler is superior as it decreases the adverse effects. The usage of bicycle is far better than the use of motor vehicles.
Few
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that riding a bicycle within a city is better and 2% of them
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that travelling
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
through
taxi is well within the local areas. This essay
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agrees
with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of two wheeled
rather
than using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
. Travelling
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
through
the cycle can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
health issues in the car we can travel
comfortably
.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
-a-days public
The verb 'preferring' is a stative verb and sometimes the progressive form is not correct. Try a simple form instead.
are preferring
four
Possible agreement error. The noun 'wheeler' seems to be countable, so consider using: "wheelers".
wheeler
to travel within their colony.
However
, there are few concerns in terms of health, the whole family can go together to enjoy their free time. They can travel
pleasantly
without any problems. They can relax themselves by listening to music and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
features which
are designed
into the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
. To the instance, I along with my family will go
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
through
the car.
Did you mean "Despite" (or, alternatively, 'in spite of')?
Despite of
few difficulties, we can roam
happily
.

On the other hand
, most of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
bicycles to go in their streets
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduces
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risks
of heart stroke, increase in blood pressure, and sugar levels. Riding a pedal cycle can train the entire body
physically
and mentally, and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keeps
us healthy. The bike doesn't cost too much and it is free from pollution.
For example
, my uncle
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
uses
bike
instead
of fossil fuel
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
. Till
The comma is probably missing here: "now, he".
now he
didn't suffer with any health
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
query and
he is more active compared to my family members.

In conclusion
, the fifty percentage of the population believes moving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
through
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicle
will be fine, while others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
two wheeler
is superior as it decreases the adverse effects. The usage of bicycle is far better than the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of motor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes
Language shapes the way we think, and determines what we can think about.
Benjamin Lee Whorf

IELTS essay You have received a letter from your university of Albion demanding a reason for your absencefrom an exam. You were ill that day, but failed to submit the evidence. Write a letter to theExaminations Committee explaining your situation. You should include: v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
263 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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