Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

You have been offered a job, asking you to start next week. You want the job very much but, because of a previous commitment, you want to delay the start for another two weeks. Write to the Manager, accepting the job, but explaining your situation and aski v.1

You have been offered a job, asking you to start next week. You want the job very much but, because of a previous commitment, you want to delay the start for another two weeks. Write to the Manager, accepting the job, but explaining your situation and aski v. 1
Holding business meetings and training via the internet has gained enormous popularity in recent years. Although the drawbacks of this are varied, in my opinion, the benefits are greater. On the one hand, conducting meetings and training sessions online may have some major disadvantages. The first drawback is the technical limitations that participants may have, which may reduce the effectiveness of discussions or meetings. For example, the elderly may find it hard to understand and make use of the latest programs and software. In additional, the signal of internet devices may be interrupted at any time which cause by unexpected reasons. As a result, it wastes time and energy of people then become an ineffective meetings or trainings. The second disadvantage is the lack of face-to-face interaction which is often considered as the key to a successful meeting or training session. There would be some misunderstandings between people due to the indirect meeting. However, I am convinced that the advantages of virtual meetings are more significant. Compared to traditional face-to-face meetings, those held online consumes much less time and money. In the past, attendants had to make long trips just to meet with other employees from other branches, however with online meetings, all team members can join the conference from any place, without the need to travel. Another advantage of online communication is that members who join meetings and training can share and organise files and presentations easily and conveniently. The files can also be edited or revised by other members, facilitating collaboration within the whole team. In conclusion, it seems that the merits of virtual meetings and trainings are more significant than the downsides.
Holding business
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meetings
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
training
via the internet has gained enormous popularity in recent years. Although the drawbacks of this
are varied
, in my opinion, the benefits are greater.

On the one hand, conducting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meetings
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
training
sessions
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
may have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
major disadvantages. The
first
drawback is the technical limitations that participants may have, which may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the
The word 'effectiveness' contains a ligature (joined letters). Modern English does not usually use ligatures. A ligature in a word causes a spelling error. If the word is an English word, write it with standard characters.
effectiveness
of discussions or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meetings
.
For example
, the elderly may find it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to understand and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of the latest programs and software. In additional, the signal of internet devices may
be interrupted
at any time which cause by unexpected reasons.
As a result
, it wastes time and energy of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
then become an ineffective
Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean "meeting"?
meetings
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trainings
. The second disadvantage is the lack of face-to-face interaction which is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
considered as the key to a successful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meeting
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
training
session. There would be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
misunderstandings between
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
due to the indirect meeting.

However
, I
am convinced
that the advantages of virtual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meetings
are more significant. Compared to traditional face-to-face
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meetings
, those held
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
consumes much less time and money. In the past, attendants had to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
long trips
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
with other employees from other branches,
however
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meetings
, all team members can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
join
the conference from any place, without the need to travel. Another advantage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
communication is that members who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
join
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meetings
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
training
can share and
Possible spelling mistake. 'organise' is British English.
organise
files and presentations
easily
and
conveniently
. The files can
also
be edited
or revised by other members, facilitating collaboration within the whole team.

In conclusion
, it seems that the merits of virtual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meetings
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trainings
are more significant than the downsides.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
Change your language and you change your thoughts.
Karl Albrecht

IELTS essay You have been offered a job, asking you to start next week. You want the job very much but, because of a previous commitment, you want to delay the start for another two weeks. Write to the Manager, accepting the job, but explaining your situation and aski v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
275 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts