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Write about the following topic: firmly be Some people believe that teaching children at home is best for a child’s development while others think that it is important for children to go to school. Discuss the advantages of both methods and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words. v.1

: firmly be Some people believe that teaching children at home is best for a child’s development while others think that it is important for children to go to school. Discuss the advantages of both methods and give your own opinion. v. 1
Education in every individual plays key role in their lives. Few may believe that children should attend school to learn things for their growth, but others feel that children should get taught at home. Here, we are going to discuss how children get benefit from stress free life by learning at home, how they gain good communication skills and be on track by attending school to gain knowledge. First, we will discuss how children get profit of stress free life and confident personality by getting taught at home. As they do not have any competition at home like in school, children can learn without any stress to get good rank or to overtake someone. Children who all get taught at home not only focus on studies, but also can spend time on other extra activities, ultimately it leads to confident personality and tension free life. Finally, Children who are attending school will get their own benefits of communication skills and social skills to survive in the future. To attend school, children have to be on time, due to this they learn punctuality which is one of the key aspects of a successful life. They do not get bored as there are many students and also learn things quickly as they will have competition. Both of the above aspects have their own benefits. According to my opinion, children can be more successful in learning if they attend school when schools focus on healthy competition between children and also other extra curriculum activities like sports and debates.
Education in every individual plays key role in their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.
Possible agreement error. The noun may seems to be uncountable; consider using: "little may".
Few may
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
should attend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
things for their growth,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
others feel that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
taught at home. Here, we are going to discuss how
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
benefit from
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
free life by learning at home, how they gain
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
communication
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and be on
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
track
by attending
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
to gain knowledge.

First
, we will discuss how
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
profit of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
free life and confident personality by getting taught at home. As they do not have any competition at home like in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
without any
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
rank or to overtake someone.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Children
who all
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
taught at home not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
focus on studies,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
can spend time on other extra activities,
ultimately
it leads to confident personality and tension free life.

Finally
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Children
who are attending
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
benefits of communication
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and social
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
to survive in the future. To attend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
be on time, due to this they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
punctuality which is one of the key aspects of a successful life. They do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
bored as there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
students and
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
things
quickly
as they will have competition.

Both of the above aspects have their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
benefits. According to my opinion,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
can be more successful in learning if they attend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
focus on healthy competition between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
and
also
other extra curriculum activities like sports and debates.
6Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
21Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
To have another language is to possess a second soul.
Charlemagne

IELTS essay : firmly be Some people believe that teaching children at home is best for a child’s development while others think that it is important for children to go to school. Discuss the advantages of both methods and give your own opinion. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
255 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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