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Write a letter to a friend who is looking for a part time job to support his studies. In your letter- Describe the job you found for him/her- Explain why this job is good for him/her- Say what he/she needs to do to get the job v.1

Write a letter to a friend who is looking for a part time job to support his studies. In your letter- Describe the job you found for him/her- Explain why this job is good for him/her- Say what he/she needs to do to get the job v. 1
Today, the foreign language contributes people to find the careers, application and earn money in various fields. Therefore, some people suppose that it is the best solution for children to become bilingual citizens at primary university instead of secondary institute. From my perspective, I agree with the mentioned viewpoint by the following reasons. Initially, the children easily learning a second language when they are in the primary department. Children can spend more time on studying because they do not have multiple assignments while the teenagers usually have to complete projects, exercises and other businesses. Moreover, under 12 years old is the important process of building our voices, kids will have chances of changing their pronunciation like local people. On the other hand, when people find out new sounds, they have to read foreign books, watch international movies and talk with foreigners. Therefore, they can create a huge number of opportunities to gain knowledge about new cultures, problems and develop the characters or models they aim to become. In the second place, knowing another linguistic helps people to course aboard when they are still young. Nowadays, most high schools and universities requires English skills if students tend to apply so using English fluently is considered as a great benefit. In addition, preparing is never late. When children consideration foreign languages early, they can have more time to experience activities and projects than teenagers have to balance between investigation and adventure. Parents should take full advantage of primary department moments to decide their children to survey. In contrast, children should learn under two languages when they are in primary. Kids do not have enough condition to connect with a variety of languages. It is the best way to avoid language disorders in children. Educational systems and parents should combine between knowledge and entertainment to inquiry effectively instead of learning only in books. In conclusion, studying foreign sound is the crucial key to broaden our horizons and achieve the best results for us. I encourage students should research early, especially in the primary department. I hope in the near future, we have more and more bilingual citizens to develop their countries and the globe.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Today
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
contributes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to find the careers, application and earn money in various fields.
Therefore
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
suppose that it is the best solution for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to become bilingual citizens at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
primary
university
instead
of secondary institute. From my perspective, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the mentioned viewpoint by the following reasons.

Initially
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
easily
learning a second
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
when they are in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
primary
department.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Children
can spend more time on studying
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they do not have multiple assignments while the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
usually
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
complete projects, exercises and other businesses.
Moreover
, under 12 years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
is the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
process of building our voices, kids will have chances of changing their pronunciation like local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
On the other hand
, when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
find out new sounds, they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
read
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
books,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
international movies and talk with foreigners.
Therefore
, they can create a huge number of opportunities to gain knowledge about new cultures, problems and develop the characters or models they aim to become.

In the second place, knowing another linguistic
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to course aboard when they are
still
young. Nowadays, most high schools and universities requires English
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
if students tend to apply
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
using English
fluently
is considered
as a great benefit.
In addition
, preparing is never late. When
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
consideration
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
early, they can have more time to experience activities and projects than
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
balance between investigation and adventure. Parents should take full advantage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
primary
department moments to decide their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to survey.

In contrast
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
should learn under two
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
when they are in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
primary
. Kids do not have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
condition to connect with a variety of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
. It is the best way to avoid
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
disorders in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. Educational systems and parents should combine between knowledge and entertainment to inquiry
effectively
instead
of learning
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
in books.

In conclusion
, studying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
sound is the crucial key to broaden our horizons and achieve the best results for us. I encourage students should research early,
especially
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
primary
department. I hope in the near future, we have more and more bilingual citizens to develop their countries and the globe.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Write a letter to a friend who is looking for a part time job to support his studies. In your letter- Describe the job you found for him/her- Explain why this job is good for him/her- Say what he/she needs to do to get the job v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
361 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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