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Without capital punishment (death penalty) our lives are less secure and crimes of more violence increase. Capital punishment is essential to control violence in society. v.2

Recently, there has been an accelerating increase in crime rates according to many surveys. To control this situation there should be a mechanism in place like lifetime jail or death penalty depending on the severity of the crime. I am inclined to believe that such mechanism will create high alert around the society and endorse a secure living to people. Many incidents are best examples of the imbalanced society values nowadays. Those are liking killing someone’s own mother or sister, or even killing children. If there are no deterrent rules and laws crimes will keep increasing day after day which will badly impact the society livelihood. Moreover, capital punishment is mandatory to implicate fear among people who create such violence that insures a peaceful life to innocent people. In fact, I tend to believe that death penalty is the only and most effective way to punish the criminals as they commit serious violence in an unethical and inhuman manners, and it directly aids in controlling crimes at least to some extent. For instance, recently a man brutally hit his sister and prevented her from seeking medical attention, she later died and no action had been taken yet against him. However, he would not even thought of doing this if other similar situations have been handled strictly and faced with capital punishment. Capital punishment gives a massage that there is no second chances when committing sever crimes. This massage is strongly needed in many societies to make sure no similar incidents will take place. What punishment do you have in your mind if someone is a psychopathic killer? Reformation facility? Minor punishment? This does not make sense, does it? In conclusion, capital punishment is important and must be used in extreme cases to bring down crime rates and provide safe lives to people.
Recently, there has been an accelerating increase in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
rates according to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
surveys. To control this situation there should be a mechanism in place like lifetime jail or death penalty depending on the severity of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
. I
am inclined
to believe that such mechanism will create high alert around the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
and endorse a secure living to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
incidents are best examples of the imbalanced
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
values nowadays. Those are liking killing someone’s
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
mother or sister, or even killing children. If there are no deterrent
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
and laws
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
increasing day after day which will
badly
impact the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
livelihood.
Moreover
, capital
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
is mandatory to implicate fear among
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who create such violence that insures a peaceful life to innocent
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

In fact, I tend to believe that death penalty is the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
and most effective way to punish the criminals as they commit serious violence in an unethical and inhuman manners, and it
directly
aids in controlling
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
at least to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
extent.
For instance
, recently a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
brutally
hit his sister and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevented
her from seeking medical attention, she later
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
died
and no action had
been taken
yet
against him.
However
, he would not even
The modal verb ‘would’ requires the verb’s base form.
thought
of doing this if other similar situations have
been handled
strictly
and faced with capital punishment.

Capital
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
gives a massage that there is no second chances when committing sever
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
. This
Possibly confused word: Did you mean “message” (= communication, or what is communicated) instead of ‘massage’ (= action of rubbing, kneading or hitting someone’s body)?
massage
is
strongly
needed in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
societies
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
sure no similar incidents will take place. What
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
do you have in your mind if someone is a psychopathic killer? Reformation facility? Minor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
? This does not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
sense, does it?

In conclusion
, capital
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
in extreme cases to bring down
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
rates and provide safe
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.
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IELTS essay without capital punishment (the death penalty) our lives are less secure and crimes of violence increase. Capital punishment is essential to control violence in society.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
302 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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