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With a fast pace of modern life more and more people are turning towards fast food for their main meals. Do you think the advantages outweigh disadvantages. v.2

With a fast pace of modern life more and more people are turning towards fast food for their main meals. Do you think the advantages outweigh disadvantages. v. 2
The fast rhythm of the present days made many people adopt fast food as their main meals of the day. Fast food can save a lot of time and also avoid the difficulties of home cooking, however, when consumed frequently as the most important meals of the day it can be very malicious. Fast food can certainly save time and avoid some troubles. As the name suggests, this food is quickly prepared so the client can collect it without waiting much, sparing the clients short time to get something to eat. In addition to that, the consumers can also avoid the problems of cooking at home, problems as the ingredients, that they need to go to the grocery shop to buy, the need of knowing how to cook correctly and the energy they have to spend doing it. Nevertheless, fast food has big drawbacks. One of these drawbacks is the extremely poor alimentation, especially if there are children involved in this bad eating habit. This kind of food lacks the nutrients the human body needs to sustain itself, furthermore, this particular problem is even worse for children because they are still in their growing stage. Besides that, fast food is full of oil, sugar and salt, who, when consumed in big proportions leads to severe health problems, as diabetes, the clogging of the arteries and problems with blood pressure. In conclusion, fast food can surely spare the consumers time, yet the many health related issues that, when consumed constantly, make the disadvantages of it a lot more significant than the advantages. Since that is very important to educate people to consume more home cooked food, so they can have a healthier life.
The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
rhythm of the present days made
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
adopt
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
as their main meals of the day.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
can save
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and
also
avoid the difficulties of home cooking,
however
, when consumed
frequently
as the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
meals of the day it can be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
malicious.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
can
certainly
save
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and avoid
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
troubles. As the name suggests, this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
is
quickly
prepared
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
the client can collect it without waiting much, sparing the clients short
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
something to eat.
In addition
to that, the consumers can
also
avoid the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
of cooking at home,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
as the ingredients, that they need to go to the grocery shop to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
, the need of knowing how to cook
correctly
and the energy they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
spend doing it.

Nevertheless
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
drawbacks. One of these drawbacks is the
extremely
poor alimentation,
especially
if there are children involved in this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
eating habit. This kind of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
lacks the nutrients the human body needs to sustain itself,
furthermore
, this particular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
is even worse for children
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they are
still
in their growing stage.
Besides
that,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
is full of oil, sugar and salt, who, when consumed in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
proportions leads to severe health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
, as diabetes, the clogging of the arteries and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
with blood pressure.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
can
surely
spare the consumers
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
,
yet
the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
health related issues that, when consumed
constantly
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the disadvantages of it a lot more significant than the advantages. Since
that is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to educate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to consume more home cooked
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they can have a healthier life.
13Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
24Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes
He who knows no foreign languages knows nothing of his own.
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

IELTS essay With a fast pace of modern life more and more people are turning towards fast food for their main meals. Do you think the advantages outweigh disadvantages. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
282 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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