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While, some individuals believe that people feel unsafe at their a residence and also when they outside. There are several factors and solutions. I would discuss these both views in upcoming paragraph v.1

While, some individuals believe that people feel unsafe at their a residence and also when they outside. There are several factors and solutions. I would discuss these both views in upcoming paragraph v. 1
Feeling unsafe is common nowadays. No one is safe on the roads as well as their home also. However, some people considered that they feel unsafe in their house as well as outside. While that is happening because of road accidents and war between countries, there are a few solutions as well. On the one hand, two main causes of feeling unsafe in outside and home are road accidents and war. firstly, the road accident rate is increasing all over the earth and people becoming unsafe. In other words, people driving without responsibility and a lot of accidents happening all over the world an because of that, people feeling depressed and tensed and feeling unsafe. Secondly, another main cause is war between countries. Because war between states can damaged the happier life of people and they can feel unsafe as well as unhappier on that situation. For example, there was no one outside of home in Iran at the time of fight against the USA and this is the cause of unsafe in the outside of home. On the other hand, the first solution is the responsibility of government. Furthermore, if a government responsible to blemish the road accident, they will developed the punishment system of drive safely. As a result, people will be drive seriously and ordinary people can lead a happier life as well. Another solution is friendly world leaders. Therefore, if the leaders of countries are friendly, they will be respectful to each other. For that reason, they will talked friendly and there will be no fight and people can lead a happier life. For instance, Norendra modi the president of India and Sheikh Hasina the president of Bangladesh are so much friendly and there were no fight between these two countries. In conclusion, crime and clash producing unsafe earth in this modern era. Although, these problems can be tackled by responsible government and friendly meeting of world leaders. It is because, the government punishment can force people for drive unsafely as well as friendly leaders can demolish clashes between countries.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Feeling
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
unsafe
is common nowadays. No one is safe on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
as their home
also
.
However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
considered that they feel
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
unsafe
in their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
outside
. While
that is
happening
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
accidents
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
war
between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
, there are a few solutions
as well
.

On the one hand, two main causes of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
feeling
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
unsafe
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
outside
and home are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
accidents
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
war
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
firstly
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
accident
rate is increasing all over the earth and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
becoming
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
unsafe
.
In other words
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
driving without responsibility and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
accidents
happening all over the world
Did you mean "and" or "any"?
an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of that,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
feeling
depressed and tensed and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
feeling
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
unsafe
.
Secondly
, another main cause is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
war
between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
war
between states can damaged the happier life of
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
people and
they can feel
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
unsafe
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
as unhappier on that situation.
For example
, there was no one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
outside
of home in Iran at the time of fight against the USA and this is the cause of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
unsafe
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
outside
of home.

On the other hand
, the
first
solution is the responsibility of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
.
Furthermore
, if a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
responsible to blemish the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
accident
, they will
The verb 'will' requires the base form of the verb: "develop"
developed
the punishment system of drive
safely
.
As a result
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will be drive
seriously
and ordinary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can lead a happier life as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
. Another solution is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friendly
world
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leaders
.
Therefore
, if the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leaders
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friendly
, they will be respectful to each other. For that reason, they will
The verb 'will' requires the base form of the verb: "talk"
talked
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friendly
and there will be no fight and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can lead a happier life.
For instance
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Norendra
Possible spelling mistake found.
modi
the president of India and Sheikh
Possible spelling mistake found.
Hasina
the president of Bangladesh are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
much
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friendly
and there were no fight between these two countries.

In conclusion
, crime and clash producing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
unsafe
earth in this modern era. Although, these problems can
be tackled
by responsible
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friendly
meeting of world
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leaders
. It is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
punishment can force
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
for drive
unsafely
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friendly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leaders
can demolish clashes between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
.
24Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
62Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9Mistakes
Language is the blood of the soul into which thoughts run and out of which they grow.
Oliver Wendell Holmes

IELTS essay While, some individuals believe that people feel unsafe at their a residence and also when they outside. There are several factors and solutions. I would discuss these both views in upcoming paragraph v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
344 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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