Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Which way do you think is the best for a student to make new friends? 1. Joining a sports team2. Participate in community activities3. Traveling v.2

Which way do you think is the best for a student to make new friends? 1. Joining a sports team2. Participate in community activities3. Traveling v. 2
making new friends is a very challenging matter for all people, especially youngsters and students. there are different ways to become familiar with a new person. The opinions are divided to whether as joining a sport team, participating in community activities or traveling would be the best strategies to find new mates. when it comes to me, it is my firm conviction that the benefits of traveling in order to get aquainted with other people are higher than other mentioned options. To support this, there are several reasons, two of which are going to be aptly explored in the following. First and foremost, students who travels to different regions, provinces or even different contries bring about with lot of challenges. In order to solve these difficulties, they have to deal with strangers and talk to them, explan their challenge and ask them ther helping hands. I will bring an example to illuminate this subject. Consider a group of students who are going to visits a historical site in an other city for a class project. During this journey, members have the opportunity to know each other better and even in some cases establish rapport. In that historical, they required to gather information from knowledgeable vistors. thus they have to approach them and start a conversation. these purposeful speeches could be the start of an itimate relationship. As you can see, a travel will increase the chance of making potential friendships. The second reason behind my standpoint is rooted in the fact that atmosphere of a journey is very favorable and pleasant for students and people. they are more delightful. it goes without saying, In their ongoing life, people and especially students have a hectic daily schedule and do not motivated or prepared enough for finding new friends. Trip is kind of escapism for students, as a result they have the chance to relieve their stresses and unwind. thus they are ready for finding new friends. In brief, I believe that traveling is the best means of establishing a new relationship with other persons. since not only people have more chances to start a conversation with others but also they have more readiness to accept a new buddy.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
making
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
friends is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
challenging matter for all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
,
especially
youngsters and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
there
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
ways to become familiar with a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
person. The opinions
are divided
to whether as joining a sport team, participating in community activities or traveling would be the best strategies to find
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
mates.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
when
it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to me, it is my firm conviction that the benefits of traveling in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
Possible spelling mistake found.
aquainted
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are higher than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
mentioned options. To support this, there are several reasons, two of which are going to be
aptly
explored in the following.

First
and foremost,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
who
Did you mean "travel"? Alternatively, check whether the singular of 'students' should be used.
travels
to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
regions, provinces or even
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
Possible spelling mistake found.
contries
bring about with
It seems that an article is missing.
lot of
challenges. In order to solve these difficulties, they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
deal with strangers and talk to them,
Possible spelling mistake found.
explan
their challenge and ask them
Possible spelling mistake found.
ther
helping hands. I will bring an example to illuminate this subject. Consider a group of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
who are going to visits a historical site in an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
city for a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
project. During this journey, members have the opportunity to know each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
better and even in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
cases establish rapport. In that historical, they required
Did you mean "gathering"? Or maybe you should add a pronoun? In active voice, 'require' + 'to' takes an object, usually a pronoun.
to gather
information from knowledgeable
Possible spelling mistake found.
vistors
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
thus
they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
approach them and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
a conversation.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
these
purposeful speeches could be the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
of an
Possible spelling mistake found.
itimate
relationship. As you can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
, a travel will increase the chance of making potential friendships.

The second reason behind my standpoint
is rooted
in the fact that atmosphere of a journey is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
favorable and pleasant for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
they
are more delightful.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
it
goes without saying, In their ongoing life,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and
especially
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
have a hectic daily schedule and do not
After the auxiliary verb 'do', use the base form of a verb. Did you mean "motivate"?
motivated
or prepared
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
for finding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
friends. Trip is kind of escapism for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
,
as a result
they have the chance to relieve their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stresses
and unwind.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
thus
they are ready for finding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
friends.

In brief
, I believe that traveling is the best means of establishing a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
relationship with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
persons.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
since
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have more chances to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
a conversation with others
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
they have more readiness to accept a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
buddy.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
23Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
20Mistakes

IELTS essay Which way do you think is the best for a student to make new friends? 1. Joining a sports team2. Participate in community activities3. Traveling v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
367 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts