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Which one do you prefer? Why? –a company offering you a job with challenging and interesting projectsbut less vacation days or–another company offering you a job that is not so challenging andinteresting but has more vacation days. v.2

Which one do you prefer? Why? –a company offering you a job with challenging and interesting projectsbut less vacation days or–another company offering you a job that is not so challenging andinteresting but has more vacation days. v. 2
It is true that, although some university students are able to live with their families while studying in their home town, others are forced to live away from home in order to pursue their studies. There are advantages and disadvantages of both these situations. If university students are able to live with their families, there are both benefits and drawbacks. Firstly, one major advantage is that they are able to economize, since they do not have to pay for accommodation. Secondly, they enjoy family support in terms of sharing meals, heating costs, possibly even sharing a room with a brother or sister. However, the home situation may also have its disadvantages. Familiar routines are often disruptive for students who have to concentrate on their studies in a quiet atmosphere. Without a dedicated space in which to study, for example in the evenings or at weekends, it is hard to keep up with a study schedule. On the other hand, when students live away from home, they also face challenges. One disadvantage is having to find accommodation. Universities are often located in major urban centres, where rents are high if students have to find a room with even the basic facilities. However, there are benefits of learning to study independently in another city. Students are able to escape the distractions of family life, and thereby establish study routines and form friendships with other students who find themselves in the same situation. These factors may help them in their studies. In conclusion, while there will clearly be differences in the personal circumstances of individual university students, some potential advantages and disadvantages of living at home or away from home can be identified.
It is true that, although
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
able
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
while studying in their home town, others
are forced
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
away from home in order to pursue their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
. There are advantages and disadvantages of both these situations.

If
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
able
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
, there are both benefits and drawbacks.
Firstly
, one major advantage is that they are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
able
to economize, since they do not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
pay for accommodation.
Secondly
, they enjoy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
support in terms of sharing meals, heating costs,
possibly
even sharing a room with a brother or sister.
However
, the home situation may
also
have its disadvantages. Familiar routines are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
disruptive for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
who
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
concentrate on their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
in a quiet atmosphere. Without a dedicated space in which to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
,
for example
in the evenings or at weekends, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
up with a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
schedule.

On the other hand
, when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
away from home, they
also
face challenges. One
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
disadvantage
is having to find accommodation.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Universities
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
located in major urban
Possible spelling mistake. 'centres' is British English.
centres
, where rents are high if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
find a room with even the basic facilities.
However
, there are benefits of learning to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
independently
in another city.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Students
are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
able
to escape the distractions of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
life, and thereby establish
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
routines and form friendships with other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
who find themselves in the same situation. These factors may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them in their studies.

In conclusion
, while there will
clearly
be differences in the personal circumstances of individual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
potential advantages and disadvantages of living at home or away from home can
be identified
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Which one do you prefer? Why? –a company offering you a job with challenging and interesting projectsbut less vacation days or–another company offering you a job that is not so challenging andinteresting but has more vacation days. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
280 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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