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Which one do you do you prefer? why? 1. A company offering you a job with challenging and interesting projects but less vacation days. 2. Another company offering you a job that is not challenging and interesting but has more vacation days v.1

Which one do you do you prefer? why? 1. A company offering you a job with challenging and interesting projects but less vacation days. 2. Another company offering you a job that is not challenging and interesting but has more vacation days v. 1
Throughout history, a job has played a prominent role in all societies. Due to it is paramount importance the job seekers must choose a proper job. A controversial question which is often raised this idea about the job situation and condition. Some people may hold the view that the beneficial job has many trials and needs much time to do it. However, some other take an opposite viewpoint and believe that the adequate career has the simple role and also, have many days as holidays. I personally contend that the proper job has a fewer provocation and has merits holidays. In the following paragraphs, I will delve into the outstanding reasons. The first exquisite factor to be mentioned is that the worker needs holidays to become fresh and spend time with their family. To elaborate on my point, since the people who have routine jobs get less tired than other workers, they can consume beneficial time with their family members. In other words, the people who have excellent vacation have indulged from this situation so that they can supervisor their children in many ways such as doing homework, nutritious, playing, and many other items. Beyond shade of a doubt, they grow their children as they see fit. Furthermore, if the citizenships have time for vacation, they would reduce their stress, and consume time for the trips and friends. A significant example that strikes in my mind is about my own experience. I have a job with a routine order; thus, I do my job without any stress. Furthermore, owing to having much time for holidays, I reduce my stress. In addition, I have not only free time to spend with my family but also free time for go to a journey. Another reason which deserves some words that the employers with simple work and have vacation they have more energy to do their jobs. As matter of fact, inasmuch as they have free time, the worker becomes less tired so that they do their jobs with elevate energy; therefore, the yield of their work are increased. Hence, this person because of this situation, they can find the second career or establish their own jobs. I believe that in this era, people need more money to attain a goal and continuing life. In other words, the economic situation of the country most people cannot effort them require their life with one job. Based on the most recent study by Iran Census Bureau, 45% of the people in my country need more than one jobs to attain their goal. To wrap it up, all the aforementioned reasons lead us to the conclusion that the job with a fewer challenge and have more holidays are better for people. I believe that people with simple work not only can spend their time with family and reduce their stress but also they can establish their own company and it helps them to have an adequate economic situation.
Throughout history, a
job
has played a prominent role in all societies. Due to it is paramount importance the
job
seekers
must
choose a proper
job
. A controversial question which is
often
raised this
idea
about the
job
situation
and condition.
Some
people
may hold the view that the beneficial
job
has
many
trials and
needs
much
time
to do it.
However
,
some
other
take an opposite viewpoint and believe that the adequate career has the simple role and
also
, have
many
days as
holidays
. I
personally
contend that the proper
job
has a fewer provocation and has merits
holidays
. In the following paragraphs, I will delve into the outstanding reasons.

The
first
exquisite factor to
be mentioned
is that the worker
needs
holidays
to become fresh and spend
time
with their
family
. To elaborate on my point, since the
people
who have routine
jobs
get
less tired than
other
workers, they can consume beneficial
time
with their
family
members. In
other
words, the
people
who have excellent vacation have indulged from this
situation
so
that they
can supervisor
their children in
many
ways such as doing homework, nutritious, playing, and
many
other
items. Beyond shade of a doubt, they grow their children as they
see
fit.
Furthermore
, if the
citizenships have
time
for vacation, they would
reduce
their
stress
, and consume
time
for the trips and friends. A significant example that strikes in my mind is about my
own
experience. I have a
job
with a routine order;
thus
, I do my
job
without any
stress
.
Furthermore
, owing to having much
time
for
holidays
, I
reduce
my
stress
.
In addition
, I have not
only
free
time
to spend with my
family
but
also
free
time
for go to a journey.

Another reason which deserves
some
words that the employers with simple work and have vacation they have more energy to do their
jobs
. As matter of fact, inasmuch as they have free
time
, the worker becomes less tired
so
that they do their
jobs
with elevate energy;
therefore
, the yield of their work
are increased
.
Hence
, this person
because of this
situation
, they can find the second career or establish their
own
jobs
. I believe that in this era,
people
need
more money to attain a goal and continuing life. In
other
words, the economic
situation
of the country most
people
cannot effort them require their life with one
job
. Based on the most recent study by Iran Census Bureau, 45% of the
people
in my country
need
more than one
jobs
to attain their goal.

To wrap it up, all the aforementioned reasons lead us to the conclusion that the
job
with a fewer challenge and have more
holidays
are better for
people
. I believe that
people
with simple work not
only
can spend their
time
with
family
and
reduce
their
stress
but
also
they can establish their
own
company
and it
helps
them to have an adequate economic
situation
.
23Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
60Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay Which one do you do you prefer? why? 1. A company offering you a job with challenging and interesting projects but less vacation days. 2. Another company offering you a job that is not challenging and interesting but has more vacation days v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
492 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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