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When visiting foreign countries some people think that it is advantageous to learn their cultures and traditions How do u think people can learn other cultures and traditions Why do u think that some people are interested in learning those traditions and v.2

When visiting foreign countries some people think that it is advantageous to learn their cultures and traditions How do u think people can learn other cultures and traditions Why do u think that some people are interested in learning those traditions and v. 2
It is true that acquiring the knowledge of the new cultures and traditions are beneficial for travelers who come from other countries. In my opinion, I believe that people can approach different cultures and tradition from many ways, and there are some reasons why many people suppose that they can be exposed to many exciting experiences from other customs and tradition while others do not want to learn that. On the one hand, there are a variety of methods to learn the foreign’s cultures and tradition. Firstly, the public media as print media and electronic media is the easy pathway to introduce concerning other countries’ tradition and values. Many detailed resources stem from the libraries, the newspapers and the Internet, so they can find anything by them to broaden their horizons. Secondly, if they have enough time and money, they should travel to gain some valuable experience. As I always spend time to travel to another country each year, sometimes by a tour which is included all services that I did not have to worry about anything and sometimes by myself which is demonstrated that I could overcome all obstacles in my trip. On the other hand, there are both negative effects and positive effects when studying about the visiting countries’ cultures. Regarding with advantageous point, travelers can obtain a lot of real experience through participating other nation cultural activities and celebrations. For instance, when they had a chance to travel to Thailand, they could watch the shows of transgender model and claim that they could understand the difficulties of these people. Thus, they would show much more positive attitudes towards transsexual men and women. However, some people don' t appreciate the cultures of the nations where they came to, because they respect their own culture and tradition, especially religion. To be specific, if they are Muslims, they will still wear the traditional outfits even travelling to foreign countries. In conclusion, they can gain valuable knowledge about the other country’s life and tradition through the public media or visiting in this country, and it seems to be that there are some advantages and disadvantages if learning a new nation’s custom and tradition.
It is true that acquiring the knowledge of the new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultures
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditions
are beneficial for travelers who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
. In my opinion, I believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can approach
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultures
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tradition
from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
ways, and there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
reasons why
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
suppose that they can
be exposed
to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
exciting experiences from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
customs and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tradition
while others do not want to learn that.

On the one hand, there are a variety of methods to learn the foreign’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultures
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tradition
.
Firstly
, the public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
as print
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
and electronic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
is the easy pathway to introduce concerning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries’
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tradition
and values.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
detailed resources stem from the libraries, the newspapers and the Internet,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they can find anything by them to broaden their horizons.
Secondly
, if they have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
time and money, they should travel to gain
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
valuable experience. As I always spend time to travel to another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
each year,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
by a tour which
is included
all services that I did not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
worry about anything and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
by myself which
is demonstrated
that I could overcome all obstacles in my trip.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, there are both
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effects and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
effects when studying about the visiting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries’
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultures
. Regarding with advantageous point, travelers can obtain
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
real experience through participating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
nation cultural activities and celebrations.
For instance
, when they had a chance to travel to Thailand, they could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
of transgender model and claim that they could understand the difficulties of these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
Thus
, they would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
much more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
attitudes towards transsexual
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
and women.
However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
Possible spelling mistake found.
don&
#039; t appreciate the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultures
of the nations where they came to,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they respect their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tradition
,
especially
religion. To be specific, if they are Muslims, they will
still
wear the traditional outfits even travelling to foreign countries.

In conclusion
, they can gain valuable knowledge about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country’s
life and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tradition
through the public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
or visiting in this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
, and it seems to be that there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
advantages and disadvantages if learning a new nation’s custom and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tradition
.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
34Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
Language is the blood of the soul into which thoughts run and out of which they grow.
Oliver Wendell Holmes

IELTS essay When visiting foreign countries some people think that it is advantageous to learn their cultures and traditions How do u think people can learn other cultures and traditions Why do u think that some people are interested in learning those traditions and v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
362 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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