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When new towns are planned it is more important to build public parks or sports facilities than shopping centers for people to spend their free time To what extent do you agree or disagree v.2

When new towns are planned it is more important to build public parks or sports facilities than shopping centers for people to spend their free time v. 2
Over a period of time, green lashes are said to be the required element which needed to be present at the places where there are dewellers. But with increase in population shopping centers are been to be considered the priorty to be build in any new town or city. This development has a great impact on the people living near by either positively or negatively. On the one side, as we know woth increase in population many individuals from small twons and cities shifts to rural areas for the faclilities which are been provided over here. As a result shopping malls also plays the same importance in any town or city. Moreover, these malls has given every individual a libralisation to get the products or services on conveinent baises. Further more, this enhanced the rate of employment among people living in that area. On the other hand, public parks or sports centers also ahs there positive side to it. As these parks is a good source of bringing up healthy realtionships among the neighbourhood of the town one lives in. Therefore, parks not just only keeps to fit but also allows everyone to introduce one with the motive of harmonious living style which is been missing these days. Moreover, parks can be the source to provide you be the only connectivity between the nature around us. To conclude, towns have been brurgeoning up with new schemes and new way of planning of these sort of cities have widely spread over all the countries with the introduction of shopping malls near by. To my view point i believe that these changes are good but still the advantages does outweighs the disadvantages for the same.
Over a period of time, green lashes
are said
to be the required element which needed to be present at the places where there are
dewellers
.
But
with increase in population shopping centers
are been
to
be considered
the
priorty
to be build in any new
town
or city. This development has a great impact on the
people
living
near by
either
positively
or
negatively
.

On the one side, as we know
woth
increase in population
many
individuals from
small
twons
and
cities
shifts to rural areas for the
faclilities
which
are been
provided over here.
As a result
shopping malls
also
plays the same importance in any
town
or city.
Moreover
, these malls has
given
every individual a
libralisation
to
get
the products or services on
conveinent
baises
.
Further
more, this enhanced the rate of employment among
people
living in that area.

On the other hand
, public
parks
or sports centers
also
ahs
there
positive
side to it.
As
these
parks
is a
good
source of bringing up healthy
realtionships
among the
neighbourhood
of the
town
one
lives
in.
Therefore
,
parks
not
just
only
keeps to fit
but
also
allows
everyone to introduce one with the motive of harmonious living style which
is been
missing these days.
Moreover
,
parks
can be the source to provide you be the
only
connectivity between
the nature around us
.

To conclude
,
towns
have been
brurgeoning
up with new schemes and new way of planning of
these sort
of
cities
have
widely
spread over all the countries with the introduction of shopping malls
near by
. To my view point
i
believe that these
changes
are
good
but
still
the advantages does outweighs the disadvantages for the same.
13Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
10Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
20Mistakes

IELTS essay When new towns are planned it is more important to build public parks or sports facilities than shopping centers for people to spend their free time v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
283 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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