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When choosing a job, the salary is the most important consideration for many. Others, however, prefer different other aspects of a job over the salary they earn. In your opinion what are the most important aspects of a job? v.1

When choosing a job, the salary is the most important consideration for many. Others, however, prefer different other aspects of a job over the salary they earn. In your opinion what are the most important aspects of a job? v. 1
In the capitalist society, money has become the driving force in all the matters. There are two schools of thought on the subject: one it is believed by some folks that money is considered as the prominent factor while selecting a job while there are others who possess the notion that there are several other reasons which are preferred. This essay will discuss why ethical demands and passion-orientated holds more importance. Firstly, it is seen that it is the passion towards a job that brings both productivity and a sense of contentment. Even though there are masses who suppress their instinct and prefers the job that is providing them a big amount of check but later on it becomes suffocating and frustration. For instance, I am presently working as a Project Manager in an IT Company, which is not my interest of job. I wished to become a Software Developer. But the management offered me luring sum of money which I accepted enthusiastically but now it just sucks. Therefore, one who follows the inner consciousness can only bring efficiency in the work. Moreover, a job that includes the welfare of society gives way to the peace of mind. Ethical job instills positivity and brings fame as well. For instance, Mother Teresa who is well-known even today also. She tried to change the world with love, care and become the real definition of humanity. Such a job brings a smile on the face and releases the stress which is common among people. In conclusion, money is crucial for some people while searching for the job but others take into account other aspects while applying for a job. One can avoid becoming the victim of depression if the job of interesting field is preferred or a job that becomes the reason of comfort for others.
In the capitalist society,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
has
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
become
the driving force in all the matters. There are two schools of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
on the subject: one it
is believed
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
folks that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
is considered
as the prominent factor while selecting a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
while there are others
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
possess the notion that there are several
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
reasons which
are preferred
. This essay will discuss why ethical demands and passion-orientated holds more importance.

Firstly
, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that it is the passion towards a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
brings
both productivity and a sense of contentment.
Even though
there are masses
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
suppress their instinct and prefers the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
that is
providing them a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
amount of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
check
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
later on it
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
becomes
suffocating and frustration.
For instance
, I am
presently
working as a Project Manager in an IT
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Company
, which is not my interest of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
. I wished to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
become
a Software Developer.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
the management offered me luring sum of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
which I
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
accepted
enthusiastically
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
it
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
sucks.
Therefore
, one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
follows the inner consciousness can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bring
efficiency in the work.

Moreover
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
that includes the welfare of society gives way to the peace of mind. Ethical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
instills positivity and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
brings
fame
as well
.
For instance
, Mother Teresa
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
is well-known even
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
also
. She tried to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
the world with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
, care and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
become
the real definition of humanity. Such a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
brings
a smile on the face and releases the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
which is common among
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
is crucial for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
while searching for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
others take into account
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
aspects while applying for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
. One can avoid becoming the victim of depression if the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
of interesting field
is preferred
or a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
becomes
the reason of comfort for others.
11Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
30Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes

IELTS essay When choosing a job, the salary is the most important consideration for many. Others, however, prefer different other aspects of a job over the salary they earn. In your opinion what are the most important aspects of a job? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
303 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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