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What should students do during vacation? Give reasons and details to support your response. v.1

What should students do during vacation? Give reasons and details to support your response. v. 1
Food is crucial for our survival. These days, many consumers are eating food that has travelled thousands of miles away from their producers. Some people opine that it will be good for the environment if people only eat locally produced food. I agree with this view to a certain extent. In my opinion, consumption of local food will create jobs in the local economy and help the environment, but if people eat only locally produced food, they will have fewer choices. Environmental problems are a highly debated topic these days. Huge amounts of fossil fuels have to be burned to transport food to distant places. This causes considerable damage to the environment. There will be a massive reduction in the consumption of oil if people start preferring locally grown food and hence it is good for the planet. Another argument in favour of eating locally produced food is its nutrient value. Locally grown food is nutritious because it is free of preservatives. Also, locally grown fruits and vegetables are plucked when they ripen and thus retains their nutritional content. By contrast, when they are transported from a distant place, they are plucked when they are still raw and then ripened with the help of chemicals. Regular consumption of such food items will lead to health problems in people. Even so, in my opinion, eating locally produced food alone is not a viable option because there is a limit to the kind of food that can be grown in each place. For example, fruits like apples and grapes can only be grown in cold climates. Likewise, some fruits and vegetables only grow in hot climates. There are also many regions that are not suitable for cultivation. If people eat only what is available in their region, they choices will be limited. Hence, in my opinion, locally grown food should be given preference. However, it should not be the only food available to people. To conclude, if people give preference to the local produce, it will certainly benefit their health, the environment and the local economy. Even so, in my opinion, eating locally cultivated food alone is not a viable option because it will seriously limit the food choices people have.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Food
is crucial for our survival. These days,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
consumers are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
that has travelled thousands of miles away from their producers.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
opine that it will be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
eat
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
locally
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
produced
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this view to a certain extent. In my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opinion
, consumption of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
will create jobs in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
economy and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
eat
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
locally
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
produced
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
, they will have fewer choices.

Environmental problems are a
highly
debated topic these days. Huge amounts of fossil fuels
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
be burned
to transport
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
to distant places. This causes considerable damage to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
. There will be a massive reduction in the consumption of oil if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
preferring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
locally
grown
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
and
hence
it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
for the planet. Another argument in
Possible spelling mistake. 'favour' is British English.
favour
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
locally
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
produced
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
is its nutrient value.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Locally
grown
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
is nutritious
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it is free of preservatives.
Also
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
locally
grown fruits and vegetables
are plucked
when they ripen and
thus
retains their nutritional content. By contrast, when they
are transported
from a distant place, they
are plucked
when they are
still
raw and then ripened with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of chemicals. Regular consumption of such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
items will lead to health problems in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

Even
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
, in my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opinion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
locally
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
produced
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
alone is not a viable option
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
there is a limit to the kind of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
that can
be grown
in each place.
For example
, fruits like apples and grapes can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
be grown
in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cold
climates.
Likewise
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
fruits and vegetables
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
grow in hot climates. There are
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
regions that are not suitable for cultivation. If
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
eat
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
what is available in their region,
Do not use a noun immediately after the pronoun 'they'. Use a verb or an adverb, or possibly some other part of speech.
they choices
will
be limited
.
Hence
, in my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opinion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
locally
grown
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
preference.
However
, it should not be the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
available to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

To conclude
, if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
give preference to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
produce, it will
certainly
benefit their health, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
economy. Even
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
, in my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opinion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
locally
cultivated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
alone is not a viable option
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it will
seriously
limit the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
choices
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay What should students do during vacation? Give reasons and details to support your response. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
369 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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