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Thecharts below give information on the ages of people when they gotmarried in oneparticularcountry in1996 and2008. v.1

Thecharts below give information on the ages of people when they gotmarried in oneparticularcountry in1996 and2008. v. 1
Some individuals wish that their nation host activity like sport between countries, while another school of thought says this inter-countries activity has more disadvantages than advantages. Discussing the view of those who wants the event to hold, the biggest advantage is increased revenue in a short space of time and this will in turn generate funds for other public needs of the country. This will also bring prestige and honour making them be in the limelight of upcoming activities in the future. Cultural blends among the participants from diverse places will be beneficial to athletes who participated also there is strengthened political rapport among neighbouring countries afterwards. For example, Brazil after hosting the world cup has gained exceptional growth in all areas of development. However, for people who says the demerits outweighs the merits are of the opinion that several millions are channelled into international events as which may result to a loss. Many construction and buildings are erected, for example, there are development of games villages and numeral stadiums which will no longer stand any use after the tournament. Furthermore, there is increasing crime rate as different personalities and persons will be present. For example, hotel lodgers will promote prostitution and theft since most people available will desire to explore the community To conclude and give my opinion, i will support the latter because it is a thing of prestige and honour to host an international activity like sport as it promotes benefits to the country, however, governments should be ready to face the challenges that come with it.
Some
individuals wish that their nation host
activity
like sport between
countries
, while another school of
thought
says this inter-countries
activity
has more disadvantages than advantages.

Discussing the view of those who wants the
event
to hold, the biggest advantage
is increased
revenue in a short space of time and this will in turn generate funds for other public needs of the
country
. This will
also
bring prestige and
honour
making them be in the limelight of upcoming
activities
in the future. Cultural blends among the participants from diverse places will be beneficial to athletes who participated
also
there
is strengthened
political rapport among
neighbouring
countries
afterwards.
For example
, Brazil after hosting the world cup has gained exceptional growth in all areas of development.

However
, for
people
who
says
the demerits outweighs the merits are of the opinion that several millions
are channelled
into international
events
as which may result to a loss.
Many
construction and buildings
are erected
,
for example
, there are development of games villages and numeral stadiums which will no longer stand any
use
after the tournament.
Furthermore
, there is increasing crime rate as
different
personalities and persons will be present.
For example
, hotel lodgers will promote prostitution and theft since most
people
available will desire to explore the
community


To conclude
and give my opinion,
i
will support the latter
because
it is a thing of prestige and
honour
to host an international
activity
like sport as it promotes benefits to the
country
,
however
,
governments
should be ready to face the challenges that
come
with it.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Thecharts below give information on the ages of people when they gotmarried in oneparticularcountry in1996 and2008. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
260 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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