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What is your favorite way of getting around? Describe it and explain why it is your favorite means of transportation. v.1

What is your favorite way of getting around? Describe it and explain why it is your favorite means of transportation. v. 1
It is often considered by some that putting up a library is a dissipation of funds and that it should be replaced by computers instead. Nevertheless, others disagree with them. In my own opinion, I consider that libraries are not a waste of money and should not be replaced. On the one hand, some people believe that the library is a waste of resources and funding because it is not user friendly. Books are heavy to use by students and they might need to copy notes from it if some of these are not available for borrowing as opposed to computers, wherein articles on the internet can be printed or be saved on a USB. Hence, some people think that libraries should no longer be utilized. On the other hand, there are also those who argue that libraries cannot be replaced by computers. Although reading an article in a computer may be convenient for some, it can cause distractions according to others. User can open other books or links, which prevents them from focusing on their primary tasks. Thus, others think that a library is useful and should be preserved. Finally, in my view, I think that both resources should be funded by the government. The collaboration of a library and a computer can only bring more learning resources for students and employees. Therefore, the authorities must not replace libraries, but instead add computers in it for public use. In conclusion, people have split views when it comes to financing a library or replacing them with computers. I think that the best way for the government to do is to fund on expanding and updating libraries to a modern way of learning experience for its people.
It is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
considered by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
that putting up a library is a dissipation of funds and that it should
be replaced
by computers
instead
.
Nevertheless
, others disagree with them. In my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
opinion, I consider that libraries are not a waste of money and should not
be replaced
.

On the one hand,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that the library is a waste of resources and funding
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it is not
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
user friendly
. Books are heavy to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
by
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
students and
they might need to copy notes from it if
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
of these are not available for borrowing as opposed to computers, wherein articles on the internet can
be printed
or
be saved
on a USB.
Hence
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
that libraries should no longer
be utilized
.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, there are
also
those who argue that libraries cannot
be replaced
by computers. Although reading an article in a computer may be convenient for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
, it can cause distractions according to others. User can open
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
books or links, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevents
them from focusing on their primary tasks.
Thus
, others
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
that a library is useful and should
be preserved
.

Finally
, in my view, I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
that both resources should
be funded
by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
. The collaboration of a library and a computer can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
bring more learning resources for students and employees.
Therefore
, the authorities
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
not replace libraries,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
instead
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
add
computers in it for public
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have split views when it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to financing a library or replacing them with computers. I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
that the best way for the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
to do is to fund on expanding and updating libraries to a modern way of learning experience for its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
Learn everything you can, anytime you can, from anyone you can; there will always come a time when you will be grateful you did.
Sarah Caldwell

IELTS essay What is your favorite way of getting around? Describe it and explain why it is your favorite means of transportation. v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
286 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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