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What factors are related to academic success in high school students? Write at least 250 words. v.1

What factors are related to academic success in high school students? v. 1
Online shopping is this digital era is omnipresent and popularity is ever-increasing. Whilst there are innumerable positives, some are of the view that it will lead to the shutdown of the shutdown of the retail stores in every nook and cranny of the world. In my opinion, I staunchly disagree with the statement that there will be no room for physical stores with the growth of digital shopping. At the onset, it is undeniable that shopping online gives a hassle-free experience at the touch of the button. The buyers benefit greatly from the myriad of varieties presented, able to make comparisons on the brand, enjoy doorstep delivery and huge online promotional discounts. This trend therefore leads to skyrocket sales and in turn bring attracts more customers base turning them as digital buyers which once never dreamt of online purchasing. For example, Amazon is the most preferred one-stop solution globally, which eases the shopping experience making both ends meet for both the have's and have-not's in the present economy. On the flip side, the retail shops are not far away in making their royalty customers happy. This is due to the fact that Superstores, Supermarkets and Multiplex malls as well as local shops have as much abundance with regards to clothing, food and groceries, electrical and electronics appliances and so on. What more to say is the customer footfall driven by the effect of the feel and touch attitude. Additionally, people prefer are quite not comfortable with digital view of products or are accustomed to be an online-pro; persuading people to follow the inspect-bargain-purchase behaviour. Max clothing, Reliance Digital, Saravana Superstores are a few which undoubtedly remain forever. To me, both Online and retail stores have a plenty of products and services on the go. Back in days, there is evidence that the economy was not overall digital and so people hardly ever tried purchasing online. Furthermore, the marketing and advertising have the upper hand in present days, captivating more customers into online platforms in the name of promotions, discounts and festive sales. To conclude, I believe that as long the people remain to follow feel-and-touch and inspect-bargain-purchase behaviour, the physical shops will never close. This also means that the physical and online shopping go hand in hand.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
is this digital era is omnipresent and popularity is ever-increasing. Whilst there are innumerable positives,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
are of the view that it will lead to the shutdown of the shutdown of the retail stores in every nook and cranny of the world. In my opinion, I
staunchly
disagree with the statement that there will be no room for physical stores with the growth of digital shopping.

At the onset, it is undeniable that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
gives a hassle-free experience at the touch of the button. The buyers benefit
greatly
from the myriad of varieties presented, able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
comparisons on the brand, enjoy doorstep delivery and huge
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
promotional discounts. This trend
therefore
leads to skyrocket sales and in turn bring attracts more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customers
base turning them as digital buyers which once never dreamt of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
purchasing.
For example
, Amazon is the most preferred one-
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
solution globally, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
eases
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
experience making both ends
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
for both the have's and have-not's in the present economy.

On the flip side, the retail shops are not far away in making their royalty
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customers
happy.
This is due to the fact that
Superstores, Supermarkets and Multiplex malls
as well
as local shops have as much abundance
Use "in regard to", "with regard to", or more simply "regarding".
with regards to
clothing, food and groceries, electrical and electronics appliances and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on. What more to say is the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customer
footfall driven by the effect of the feel and touch attitude.
Additionally
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
prefer are quite not comfortable with digital view of products or are
The verb 'are' is used with the gerund form: "accustomed to being".
accustomed to be
an online-pro; persuading
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to follow the inspect-bargain-
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
. Max clothing, Reliance Digital,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Saravana
Superstores are a few which
undoubtedly
remain forever.

To me, both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Online
and retail stores have a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plenty
of products and services on the go. Back in days, there is evidence that the economy was not
overall
digital and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
hardly ever tried purchasing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
.
Furthermore
, the marketing and advertising have the upper hand in present days, captivating more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customers
into
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
platforms in the name of promotions, discounts and festive sales.

To conclude
, I believe that as long the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
remain to follow feel-and-touch and inspect-bargain-
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
, the physical shops will never close. This
also
means that the physical and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
go hand in hand.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay What factors are related to academic success in high school students? v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
377 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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