Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

We are increasingly depending on computers. They are used in business, hospitals, crime detection and even to fly planes. What things will they be used in future? Is the dependence on computers is a good thing or should we be more suspicious of their benefits? v.1

We are increasingly depending on computers. They are used in business, hospitals, crime detection and even to fly planes. What things will they be used in future? Is the dependence on computers is a good thing or should we be more suspicious of their benefits? v. 1
Computers have invaded the world with a plethora of applications, causing a gradual dependency of man on it, with no field spared from its impact ranging from schools to large scale market, medical use, defence and many more. In my view it has a remarkable ability to outperform in impending years and its consequences are rather debatable. Computers are man-made device, intended to perform a tedious task with an ease. With the help of internet technology it has changed the functionality of the world. Data management of any organization ranging from micro businesses to mega factories has been lucrative as it can shrink the workforce required to manage it before. With its copious merits dependency of humans with technology elevated with time. To illustrate this, nowadays high risk areas like chemical manufacturing factories across the globe, employs SCADA a computer aided program, the whole unit is handled in a single workstation thereby benefiting to operate it on a high Accuracy and safety scale. Extension to it, with its tremendous functionality and increasing human contingency, also have certain loopholes, like dearth in the workforce, a requirement of a qualified personnel to operate the system. Moreover complex assignments entail a high end processing unit causing to sore operational expenditure. For instance a simple retail outlet employing computers requires high end software, printers, and other devices to manage his workstation, which could be rather managed by simple old fashion paper and pen. So with its apprehensive merit have a certainty to create a quandary with the end user. To sum up, having recapitulated the facts, drew manifold pros and cons me to the conclusion that, dependency on technology is beneficial in every field is which often deploys workers leading to unemployment yet improves productivity, rather leaves me in a dilemma.
Computers have invaded the world with a plethora of applications, causing a gradual dependency of
man
on it, with no field spared from its impact ranging from schools to large scale market, medical
use
,
defence
and
many
more. In my view it has a remarkable ability to outperform in impending years and its consequences are
rather
debatable.

Computers are
man
-made device, intended to perform a tedious task with an
ease
. With the
help
of internet technology it has
changed
the functionality of the world. Data management of any organization ranging from micro businesses to mega factories has been lucrative as it can shrink the workforce required to manage it
before
. With its copious merits dependency of humans with technology elevated with time. To illustrate this, nowadays high
risk
areas like chemical manufacturing factories across the globe, employs SCADA a computer aided program, the whole unit
is handled
in a single workstation thereby benefiting to operate it on a
high


Accuracy and safety scale.

Extension to it, with its tremendous functionality and increasing human contingency,
also
have certain loopholes, like dearth in the workforce, a requirement of a qualified personnel to operate the system.
Moreover
complex assignments entail a high
end
processing unit causing to sore operational expenditure.
For instance
a simple retail outlet employing computers requires high
end
software, printers, and other devices to manage his workstation, which could be
rather
managed by simple
old
fashion paper and pen.
So
with its apprehensive merit have a certainty to create a quandary with the
end
user.

To sum up, having recapitulated the facts, drew manifold pros and cons me to the conclusion that, dependency on technology is beneficial in every field is which
often
deploys workers leading to unemployment
yet
improves
productivity,
rather
leaves
me in a dilemma.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes

IELTS essay We are increasingly depending on computers. They are used in business, hospitals, crime detection and even to fly planes. What things will they be used in future? Is the dependence on computers is a good thing or should we be more suspicious of their benefits? v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
297 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts