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Some people say that modern innovations bring a lot more problems than benefits? Do you agree or disagree? v.2

Some people say that modern innovations bring a lot more problems than benefits? v. 2
If asked whether new inventions cause a lot more disadvantages than advantages for people, many would struggle to make the final choice. From my perspective, I would argue that modern innovations give positive effects to humans and my reasons are discussed in this essay. First and foremost, when it comes to a plethora of creations that help people improve their life in a better way, it is impossible not to mention the internet. There is no doubt that the internet makes it convenient to everyone. People are not only able to research any information on websites without hassles but also easily communicate with each other via social network sites that allow for any age, nationality or gender. A few people claim that Facebook or Twitter likely to make ones scared to play a role in a face to face conversation. However, it is about discipline and usage which should be controlled by individuals. Inventions should not be held responsible for this. Admittedly, the more modern life becomes, the more important role the internet plays. The internet is exactly one of the most beneficial human discoveries. Another reason in line with my ideology is that apart from the change of the internet, the invention of the transportation system has miraculously changed human life. In the previous century, humans spent a lot of time on moving between regions due to the poor transport and the complexity of navigating. However, nowadays, because of many choices in the form of moving and the progress of the route systems, people save a lot of time, resulting in having more working time leads to a more developed economy and a happier life. Acording to a updated investigation conducted by Cambridge University in the United Kingdom, more than 90 percents of the survey respondents confirmed that vehicle inventions made their jobs more flexible and helped them earn a lot of money from saving on transportation costs. Despite of the fact that plenty of ecologists believe that the waste of machinery makes the environment polluted and adversely affects human health, scientists are trying to reduce emissions by creating means of using natural energy which could be solar instead of fossil fuels. In a nutshell, if each individual knows how to take advantage of the inventions, modern innovations will bring us beneficence and make our lives safer, easier and more comfortable. Overuse and lack of control mechanisms are the main drivers of mishaps.
If asked whether new inventions cause a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
more disadvantages than advantages for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
would struggle to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
the final choice. From my perspective, I would argue that modern innovations give
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
effects to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
and my reasons
are discussed
in this essay.

First
and foremost, when it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to a plethora of creations that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
in a better way, it is impossible not to mention the internet. There is no doubt that the internet
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
makes
it convenient to everyone.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
are not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
able to research any information on websites without hassles
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
easily
communicate with each other via social network sites that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
for any age, nationality or gender. A few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
claim that Facebook or Twitter likely to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
ones scared to play a role in a face to face conversation.
However
, it is about discipline and usage which should
be controlled
by individuals. Inventions should not
be held
responsible for this.
Admittedly
, the more modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
becomes, the more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role the internet plays. The internet is exactly one of the most beneficial
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
discoveries.

Another reason in line with my ideology is that apart from the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
of the internet, the invention of the transportation system has
miraculously
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. In the previous century,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
spent a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
of time on moving between regions due to the poor transport and the complexity of navigating.
However
, nowadays,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
choices in the form of moving and the progress of the route systems,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
save a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
of time, resulting in having more working time leads to a more developed economy and a happier
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Acording
to
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
updated investigation conducted by Cambridge University in the United Kingdom, more than 90 percents of the survey respondents confirmed that vehicle inventions made their jobs more flexible and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helped
them earn a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
of money from saving on transportation costs.
Did you mean "Despite" (or, alternatively, 'in spite of')?
Despite of
the fact that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plenty
of ecologists believe that the waste of machinery
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
makes
the environment polluted and
adversely
affects
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
health, scientists are trying to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
emissions by creating means of using natural energy which could be solar
instead
of fossil fuels.

In a nutshell, if each individual knows how to take advantage of the inventions, modern innovations will bring us beneficence and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
safer, easier and more comfortable. Overuse and lack of control mechanisms are the main drivers of mishaps.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
23Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes
A different language is a different vision of life.
Federico Fellini

IELTS essay Some people say that modern innovations bring a lot more problems than benefits? v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
404 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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