Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

We are becoming increasingly dependent on computers. They are used in business, hospitals, crime detection and even to fly planes. What things will they be used in future? Is this dependence on computer a good thing or should we more suspicious of their benefits? v.7

We are becoming increasingly dependent on computers. They are used in business, hospitals, crime detection and even to fly planes. What things will they be used in future? Is this dependence on computer a good thing or should we more suspicious of their benefits? v. 7
In the modern world people's reliance on computer is rapidly increasing. First computer was invented almost five decades ago and around 30 years personal computer has been invented spreading our lives like a virus. We can count a number of reasons from which on gets idea why people should suspicious about the benefits of computer rather than completely dependent on them. In current scenario, computers are being used in hospitals, offices, universities, research laboratories etc. In the future, computers will be used to create more complex and sophisticated algorithms that will run automobiles, factories etc. For instance, they will be run planes and also co-ordinate planes in the vicinity of the airport. Moreover, they will run cars on highways, streets and markets. For both of the phenomenon, everything will be fine with algorithms working correctly. If the smallest program fails, one can imagine the disaster. The reason people will face this kind of serious problem is, the exceeding trust on computers. With regards to the current development going on the artificial intelligence, there are possibilities they may replace teachers in schools and collages. Some people may think of this as a huge achievement, but it clearly shows the inevitable inability to control students in a classroom from flying around and also to motivate. Consequently, children may end up loosing interest in studies and being careless about career, which is an alarming sign for the future of society. In a nutshell, extreme reliance on computers is not advisable. We must make sure that we are in control of them, because initially, it may easy for us to realize that technology has taken over command, by then we will face unimaginable chaos. To avoid, we must be suspicious of benefits of computers and not totally make ourselves dependent on them
In the modern world
people
's reliance on computer is
rapidly
increasing.
First
computer
was invented
almost five decades ago and around 30 years personal computer has
been invented
spreading our
lives
like a virus. We can count a number of reasons from which on
gets
idea
why
people
should suspicious about the benefits of computer
rather
than completely dependent on them.

In
current
scenario, computers are being
used
in hospitals, offices, universities, research laboratories etc. In the future, computers will be
used
to create more complex and sophisticated algorithms that will run automobiles, factories etc.
For instance
, they will
be run
planes
and
also
co-ordinate
planes
in the vicinity of the airport.
Moreover
, they will run cars on highways, streets and markets. For both of the phenomenon, everything will be fine with algorithms working
correctly
. If the smallest program fails, one can imagine the disaster. The reason
people
will face this kind of serious problem is, the exceeding trust on computers.

With regards to
the
current
development going on the artificial intelligence, there are possibilities they may replace teachers in schools and collages.
Some
people
may
think
of this as a huge achievement,
but
it
clearly
shows
the inevitable inability to control students in a classroom from flying around and
also
to motivate.
Consequently
, children may
end
up loosing interest in studies and being careless about career, which is an alarming
sign
for the future of society.

In a nutshell, extreme reliance on computers is not advisable. We
must
make
sure that we are in control of them,
because
initially
, it may easy for us to realize that technology has taken over command, by then we will face unimaginable chaos. To avoid, we
must
be suspicious of benefits of computers and not
totally
make
ourselves dependent on
them
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay We are becoming increasingly dependent on computers. They are used in business, hospitals, crime detection and even to fly planes. What things will they be used in future? Is this dependence on computer a good thing or should we more suspicious of their benefits? v. 7

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
297 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts