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We are becoming increasingly dependent on computers. They are used in business, hospitals, crime detection and even to fly planes. What things will they be used in the future? Is this dependence on computers a good thing or should we be more suspicious of their benefits? v.6

We are becoming increasingly dependent on computers. They are used in business, hospitals, crime detection and even to fly planes. What things will they be used in the future? Is this dependence on computers a good thing or should we be more suspicious of their benefits? v. 6
There is little room for doubt that computers have occupied a major part in our ever developing world. Nonetheless, in recent years, there is a growing recognition that people are placing more and more reliance on these devices. The impact of this trend has become a source of constant debate. In my opinion, this issue should be viewed and analysed from multiple perspectives as follows. Firstly, it is important not to neglect the utter integrity of these technical devices in people's life and production. Needless to say, computers, with its unprecedented ability to deal with big data, have helped to solve many of humankind's unsolvable questions. For instance, prior to the appearance of computers, taking control over the statistics of the personnel in any corporate was always a daunting task. Examples of this kind are many. Moreover, as we are approaching an era of digital, in which data management holds a core value, the advantages of these appliances are becoming more conspicuous than ever before. However, another fact to bear in mind is that computers, useful as they are, are just a facilitator for humans to enhance their life quality. That is to say, it is advised that people strike a balance between using their own cognitive skills and the computers rather than depending wholly on the machinery. Only then do humans make full use out of computers, which is only to facilitate people to achieve their goals. In the light of these facts, one can conclude that computers hold an undeniable function in our daily activities. However, it is recommended that people only consider this technological device as a helping tool to develop their own skill set.
There is
little
room for doubt that computers have occupied a major part in our ever developing world. Nonetheless, in recent years, there is a growing recognition that
people
are placing more and more reliance on these devices. The impact of this trend has become a source of constant debate. In my opinion, this issue should
be viewed
and
analysed
from multiple perspectives as follows.

Firstly
, it is
important
not to neglect the utter integrity of these technical devices in
people
's life and production. Needless to say, computers, with its unprecedented ability to deal with
big
data, have
helped
to solve
many
of humankind's unsolvable questions.
For instance
, prior to the appearance of computers, taking control over the statistics of the personnel in any corporate was always a daunting task. Examples of this kind are
many
.
Moreover
, as we are approaching an era of digital, in which data management holds a core value, the advantages of these appliances are becoming more conspicuous than ever
before
.

However
, another fact to bear in mind is that computers, useful as they are, are
just
a facilitator for humans to enhance their life quality.
That is
to say, it
is advised
that
people
strike a balance between using their
own
cognitive
skills
and the computers
rather
than depending wholly on the machinery.
Only
then do humans
make
full
use
out of computers, which is
only
to facilitate
people
to achieve their goals.

In the light of these facts, one can conclude that computers hold an undeniable function in our daily activities.
However
, it
is recommended
that
people
only
consider this technological device as a helping tool to develop their
own
skill
set.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
A different language is a different vision of life.
Federico Fellini

IELTS essay We are becoming increasingly dependent on computers. They are used in business, hospitals, crime detection and even to fly planes. What things will they be used in the future? Is this dependence on computers a good thing or should we be more suspicious of their benefits? v. 6

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
278 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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