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Technology has made man more social or less social Discuss both views and give opinion v.2

Technology has made man more social or less social 2
There is no doubt that technology has led to dramatic changes in the society, by reshaping our social aspect. While some people state that this contributes to less social human beings, others oppose this notion. Personally, I totally agree with the former view. To begin with, those who argue that technology has played an increasing role in promoting relationships, mainly by supporting their user in virtual friendships. For instance, social media networks, such as Facebook and Instagram, which are a great source of making new friends, are composed of virtual forums. As a result, enabling people to be exposed to a variety of people from different backgrounds all over the world. In contrast, if these individuals were not exposed to these sites, they would be less likely to meet new acquaintance and keep virtual relationships. On the other hand, I would advocate that technology has made us less social due to the scarcity of physical contact among each other. In other words, if individuals spend most of their time on online platforms, they will focus only in virtual communication; thus, compromising their real relationships. For example, if we compare the old generation with the new one, the older tend to show a greater positive attitude toward new people than the youngsters, who compose the vast majority of online users. Consequently, by limiting real connections can lead us to isolation, and therefore triggering mental conditions like anxiety or depression. In conclusion, despite some people may state that technology has a positive contribute to social part, I strongly believe the opposite. It has put people’s social part in jeopardy by restricting them to virtual spaces rather than real ones.
There is no doubt that
technology
has led to dramatic
changes
in the society, by reshaping our
social
aspect. While
some
people
state that this contributes to less
social
human beings, others oppose this notion.
Personally
, I
totally
agree
with the former view.

To
begin
with, those who argue that
technology
has played an increasing role in promoting relationships,
mainly
by supporting their user in virtual friendships.
For instance
,
social
media networks, such as Facebook and Instagram, which are a great source of making
new
friends,
are composed
of virtual forums.
As a result
, enabling
people
to
be exposed
to a variety of
people
from
different
backgrounds all over the world.
In contrast
, if these individuals were not exposed to these sites, they would be less likely to
meet
new
acquaintance and
keep
virtual relationships.

On the
other
hand, I would advocate that
technology
has made us less
social
due to the scarcity of physical contact among each
other
. In
other
words, if individuals spend most of their time on online platforms, they will focus
only
in virtual communication;
thus
, compromising their real relationships.
For example
, if we compare the
old
generation with the
new
one, the older tend to
show
a greater
positive
attitude toward
new
people
than the youngsters, who compose the vast majority of online users.
Consequently
, by limiting real connections can lead us to isolation, and
therefore
triggering mental conditions like anxiety or depression.

In conclusion
, despite
some
people
may state that
technology
has a
positive
contribute to
social
part, I
strongly
believe the opposite. It has put
people’s
social
part in jeopardy by restricting them to virtual spaces
rather
than real ones.
17Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
23Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes

IELTS essay Technology has made man more social or less social 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
277 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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