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Using the professor’s example of the pizza restaurant, explain two advantages of franchising. v.1

Using the professor’s example of the pizza restaurant, explain two advantages of franchising. v. 1
The Digital era has changed the way communication is shared and consumed. Although some people believe that companionship is born through social media and chat groups, I agree with those who argue that face to face communication is an important part of developing and retaining social relationships. One of the crucial advantages of communicating through the internet is that it allows cultural exchange between people from different nations. This is because of such modes of expression that people can connect and shares their cultural values, social customs, and rituals with each other. As a result of these interactions, children are bringing change in society by questioning domestic violence such as physical, religious, verbal and emotional abuse. For instance, Countries of the Middle East banned women from driving due to religious reasons, and this was lifted in 2014 with the help of a million voters of the Facebook community page who voted against such law. Nevertheless, I believe face to face interaction is a crucial way to establish long-standing social relations. The reason for this is that such interactions provide an opportunity to ascertain the positive and negative aspects of information exchange via personal expression. For example, business are increasing their focus on physical attributes such as eye contact, expressions, and voice tone as selection criteria for interviews to maintain a cordial and friendly working environment among the professionals. As a result, people can accommodate real-time modifications that ensure enduring professional and personal relationships. Conversely, If people choose social media as an only source of communication in the future, then the friendship could be much short-lived due to incapability of ascertaining these aesthetic emotions. In conclusion, although it is of critical importance that people communicate globally to improve the developing societies, I feel that to retain long-lasting relationships, people should encourage face to face communication with each other.
The Digital era has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
the way
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communication
is shared
and consumed. Although
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that companionship
is born
through
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
media and chat groups, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with those who argue that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
face
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
face
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communication
is an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
part of developing and retaining
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
relationships.

One of the crucial advantages of communicating through the internet is that it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
cultural exchange between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
nations. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of such modes of expression that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can connect and shares their cultural values,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
customs, and rituals with each other.
As a result
of these interactions, children are bringing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
in society by questioning domestic violence such as physical, religious, verbal and emotional abuse.
For instance
, Countries of the Middle East banned women from driving due to religious reasons, and this
was lifted
in 2014 with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of a million voters of the Facebook community page who voted against such law.

Nevertheless
, I believe
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
face
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
face
interaction is a crucial way to establish long-standing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
relations.
The reason for this is
that such interactions provide an opportunity to ascertain the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
aspects of information exchange via personal expression.
For example
, business are increasing their focus on physical attributes such as eye contact, expressions, and voice tone as selection criteria for interviews to maintain a cordial and friendly working environment among the professionals.
As a result
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can accommodate real-time modifications that ensure enduring professional and personal relationships.
Conversely
, If
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
choose
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
media as an
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
source of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communication
in the future, then the friendship could be much short-
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lived
due to incapability of ascertaining these aesthetic emotions.

In conclusion
, although it is of critical importance that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
communicate globally to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the developing societies, I feel that to retain long-lasting relationships,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should encourage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
face
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
face
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communication
with each other.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Using the professor’s example of the pizza restaurant, explain two advantages of franchising. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
307 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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