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Universities should accept equal numbers of male and female students in every subject. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. v.16

Universities should accept equal numbers of male and female students in every subject. v. 16
Men and women should be offered for accepting in equilibrium number by Universities. This essay will disagree with this assertion because in some sector specific gender plays an imperative role than another and for this reason some meritorious students will be deprived. Some particular courses are suitable for one gender rather than another and it will be a whimsical idea if the authorities will allow the equal opportunity. For instance, engineering is preferable for men as they are more diligent and sedulous than opposite ones. However, Gynecology, nursing is particularly suitable for women for their scrupulousness and patience. Although nowadays women's aptitude is trying to prove their proficiency in every sphere of education, they confront with the problem in their workstation in addition male are inappropriate for a specific profession. For implementing the equal number of gender in all courses, some intelligent competitors will be underprivileged due to lack of opportunity. If universities explore the rules for equilibrium, the person who deserves a seat for particular subject will destitute and instead of his unmerited one of opposite competitor will acquire this position as a consequence, the university loses condign one and give a chance to the ineligible one so that they produce relatively unworthy graduate. For example, in case of engineering subject by following this precedent 50% female graduate will be passed every year, but they are unable to perform like male counterparts on the contrary for them another person defeated their chance to prove his worth. In conclusion, I disagree with the statement of equality of gender discrimination in every course in university since each one is not perfectly suitable for every carter as well as everyone is not equally meritorious.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Men
and women should
be offered
for accepting in equilibrium number by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Universities
. This essay will disagree with this assertion
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
sector specific gender plays an imperative role than another and
for this reason
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
meritorious students will
be deprived
.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
particular courses are suitable for one gender
rather
than another and it will be a whimsical
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
if the authorities will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
the equal opportunity.
For instance
, engineering is preferable for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
as they are more diligent and sedulous than opposite ones.
However
, Gynecology, nursing is
particularly
suitable for women for their scrupulousness and patience. Although nowadays women's aptitude is trying to prove their proficiency in every sphere of education, they confront with the problem in their workstation
in addition
male are inappropriate for a specific profession.

For implementing the equal number of gender in all courses,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
intelligent competitors will
be underprivileged
due to lack of opportunity. If
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
explore the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
for equilibrium, the person who deserves a seat for particular subject will destitute and
instead
of his unmerited one of opposite competitor will acquire this position as a consequence, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
loses condign one and give a chance to the ineligible one
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that they produce
relatively
unworthy graduate.
For example
, in case of engineering subject by following this precedent 50% female graduate will
be passed
every year,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they are unable to perform like male counterparts
on the contrary
for them another person defeated their chance to prove his worth.

In conclusion
, I disagree with the statement of equality of gender discrimination in every course in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
since each one is not
perfectly
suitable for every carter
as well
as everyone is not
equally
meritorious.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Universities should accept equal numbers of male and female students in every subject. v. 16

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
282 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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