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Universities and colleges are now offering qualifications through distance learning from the Internet rather than teachers in the classroom. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages? v.1

Universities and colleges are now offering qualifications through distance learning from the Internet rather than teachers in the classroom. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages? v. 1
In this day and age, we are dealing with Covid-19 pandemic, which is an infectious disease epidemic causing damage globally. Online learning is one of the temporary solutions to the consequences of this epidemic. However, this solution also has its benefits and limitations. Let us examine both views before reaching a concrete decision. Although many people still consider traditional schools as the best way to achieve knowledge, online learning proves to be a great alternative. First, it brings a wide range of online classes with flexible schedules to people who find it difficult to attend traditional classes on a regular basis. For example, if you are unable to attend the morning classes, you can choose to study in the afternoon or evening. Furthermore, e-learning is much cheaper. Learners can find out a huge amount of available materials with any device connected to the Internet. There is no need to move for classes, so you can save the travel expense. Last but not least, online learning can help you improve your self-study skill. Online learning means you are taught outside the classroom and without direct supervision. Thus, you have to be self-aware to study effectively. On the other hand, there are certainly shortcomings on online learning. To begin with, although learning is becoming quicker in the house, a student can easily be distracted. For instance, ưhile studying, students can turn off the camera and do other things like eating snacks, texting with friends or playing games that teachers can hardly control. Besides, online learning requires a good grasp of tech-skills. Since online classes are done completely through the computer, technological issues can occur that make it difficult to complete courses on time. All in all, I think that the advantages of distance learning far outweigh the disadvantages.
In this day and age, we are dealing with Covid-19 pandemic, which is an infectious disease epidemic causing damage globally.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
is one of the temporary solutions to the consequences of this epidemic.
However
, this solution
also
has its benefits and limitations.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Let
us examine both views
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
reaching a concrete decision.

Although
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
still
consider traditional schools as the best way to achieve knowledge,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
proves to be a great alternative.
First
, it brings a wide range of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classes
with flexible schedules to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who find it difficult to attend traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classes
on a regular basis.
For example
, if you are unable to attend the morning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classes
, you can choose to study in the afternoon or evening.
Furthermore
, e-learning is much cheaper. Learners can find out a huge amount of available materials with any device connected to the Internet. There is no need to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classes
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
you can save the travel expense. Last
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not least,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
your self-study
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
means you
are taught
outside the classroom and without direct supervision.
Thus
, you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
be self-aware to study
effectively
.

On the other hand
, there are
certainly
shortcomings on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
is becoming quicker in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
, a student can
easily
be distracted
.
For instance
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
ưhile
studying, students can turn off the camera and do other things like eating snacks, texting with friends or playing games that teachers can hardly control.
Besides
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
requires a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
grasp of tech-
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
. Since
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classes
are done
completely through the computer, technological issues can occur that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
it difficult to complete courses on time.

All in all, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that the advantages of distance
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
far outweigh the disadvantages.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes
If we spoke a different language, we would perceive a somewhat different world.
Ludwig Wittgenstein

IELTS essay Universities and colleges are now offering qualifications through distance learning from the Internet rather than teachers in the classroom. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
296 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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