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Traffic and accommodation problems are increasing and the government should encourage businesses to move from cities to rural areas. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages? v.1

Traffic and accommodation problems are increasing and the government should encourage businesses to move from cities to rural areas. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages? v. 1
Housing and traffic congestion issues are on the increase in large urban areas, there is an argument that the government ought to persuade companies to relocate to the countryside. I think that the advantages of this outweigh the downsides because housing and business overheads are more affordable and there are fewer traffic problems. Admittedly, there are disadvantages to relocating businesses and companies to rural areas. One of these is that many employees have settled with their families and own their own homes. Moving to a rural area would uproot them and their families, in addition, they may not be suited to life in the country so this could cause stress and motivation issues. To illustrate this, the Guardian newspaper carried out a survey in 2014 of employees who were transferred to new offices in small towns and rural locations. 58% of them said they were unhappy with the move and had trouble settling down. Despite these downsides, , I believe that the advantages of moving out of big cities far outweigh the disadvantages. One of these is that housing is larger and much more affordable. For instance, a small apartment in London costs three times that of a large apartment in Wiltshire which is in a very rural location. Company overheads are also far more cost effective outside of cities. An office space 15 miles out of London tends to be much bigger and overall rental costs are considerably lower than that of London. Another obvious benefit is that traffic congestion is no longer an issue in rural areas or villages. In conclusion, even though there may be downsides to companies moving out of cities, I think that relocating to the countryside carries more advantages because of cost-effective housing and business rents are much lower.
Housing and traffic congestion issues are on the increase in large urban
areas
, there is an argument that the
government
ought to persuade
companies
to relocate to the countryside. I
think
that the advantages of this outweigh the downsides
because
housing and business overheads are more affordable and there are fewer traffic problems.

Admittedly
, there are disadvantages to relocating businesses and
companies
to
rural
areas
. One of these is that
many
employees have settled with their families and
own
their
own
homes. Moving to a
rural
area
would uproot them and their families,
in addition
, they may not
be suited
to life in the country
so
this could cause
stress
and motivation issues. To illustrate this, the Guardian newspaper carried out a survey in 2014 of employees who
were transferred
to new offices in
small
towns and
rural
locations. 58% of them said they were unhappy with the
move
and had trouble settling down.

Despite these downsides,
,
I believe that the advantages of moving out of
big
cities far outweigh the disadvantages. One of these is that housing is larger and much more affordable.
For instance
, a
small
apartment in London costs three times that of a large apartment in Wiltshire which is in a
very
rural
location.
Company
overheads are
also
far more cost effective outside of cities. An office space
15 miles
out of London tends to be much bigger and
overall
rental costs are
considerably
lower than that of London. Another obvious benefit is that traffic congestion is no longer an issue in
rural
areas
or villages.

In conclusion
,
even though
there may be downsides to
companies
moving out of cities, I
think
that relocating to the countryside carries more advantages
because
of cost-effective housing and business rents are much lower.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
13Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay Traffic and accommodation problems are increasing and the government should encourage businesses to move from cities to rural areas. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
295 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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