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TPO37Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Because people are busy doing so many different things, they do very few things well. v.2

TPO37 Because people are busy doing so many different things, they do very few things well. v. 2
It is very crucial for human beings to accomplish their tasks without any mistakes. Genuinely, how many duties that people implement correctly determines their level of responsibility. Although a plethora of people hold the opinion that people who do several various things have better performances, others disagree with this point of view. I, to a great extent, hold this viewpoint that doing sundry activities would decline a person’s performances. Among countless reasons, which can vindicate my point of view, I will mention the two most conspicuous ones through the following paragraphs. The first reason that juts out of my mind easily at the first moment of thinking about this issue is the fact that people who accomplish similar activities, have well-organized minds. These individuals have excellent schedules for each day of their lives and never become dazed. Therefore, the level of their concentration is very high, and they have powerful minds. To give a tangible example, the noteworthy statistics revealed by a recently conducted research in the Massachusetts Institute of Technology (MIT) revealed that well organized people are be able to make perfect decisions in serious situations, which is very helpful in their jobs and today’s lives. Consequently, the less varieties in someone’s tasks, the more he will benefit. The second and equally exquisite proof for this assertion is about this importance that accomplishing resembling tasks decline the amount of someone’s stress. Since the amount of anxiety, which is imposed on a person, has a direct relationship with human beings health, people with low level of anxiety, would have impeccable bodies and great lifestyles. To shed more light on this matter, consider a man who has a hectic lifestyle. Beyond a shadow of a doubt, he endures a great deal of pressure and stress because of his duties. Therefore, after a while, he will become nerves and sick, and he will not be able to implement his activities as well as he did in the past. Hence, it is highly recommended that all people should not do different things. To make a long story short, based on the aforementioned arguments, we may draw the conclusion that individuals should fulfil similar things. This contention is due to the fact that by doing so, not only would they be physically and mentally in a better position, but also they are be able to do their duties with a little fault. As it is clear, the more various tasks that someone has to do, the less profit he will receive.
It is
very
crucial for human beings to accomplish their
tasks
without any mistakes.
Genuinely
, how
many
duties that
people
implement
correctly
determines their level of responsibility. Although a plethora of
people
hold the opinion that
people
who do several various things have better performances, others disagree with this point of view. I, to a great extent, hold this viewpoint that doing sundry activities would decline a person’s performances. Among countless reasons, which can vindicate my point of view, I will mention the two most conspicuous ones through the following paragraphs.

The
first
reason that juts out of my mind
easily
at the
first
moment of thinking about this issue is the fact that
people
who accomplish similar activities, have well-organized minds. These individuals have excellent schedules for each day of their
lives
and never become dazed.
Therefore
, the level of their concentration is
very
high, and they have powerful minds. To give a tangible example, the noteworthy statistics revealed by
a recently conducted research
in the Massachusetts Institute of Technology (MIT) revealed that well organized
people
are be able to
make
perfect decisions in serious situations, which is
very
helpful in their jobs and
today
’s
lives
.
Consequently
, the
less
varieties in
someone’s
tasks
, the more he will benefit.

The second and
equally
exquisite proof for this assertion is about this importance that accomplishing resembling
tasks
decline the amount of someone’s
stress
. Since the amount of anxiety, which
is imposed
on a person, has a direct relationship with human
beings
health,
people
with low level of anxiety, would have impeccable bodies and great lifestyles. To shed more light on this matter, consider a
man
who has a hectic lifestyle. Beyond a shadow of a doubt, he endures a great deal of pressure and
stress
because
of his duties.
Therefore
, after a while, he will become nerves and sick, and he will not be able to implement his activities
as well
as he did in the past.
Hence
, it is
highly
recommended that all
people
should not do
different
things.

To
make
a long story short, based on the aforementioned arguments, we may draw the conclusion that individuals should fulfil similar things. This contention is due to the fact that by doing
so
, not
only
would they be
physically
and mentally in a better position,
but
also
they are
be
able to do their duties with a
little
fault. As it is
clear
, the more various
tasks
that someone
has to
do, the less profit he will receive.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
11Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes
Learning another language is not only learning different words for the same things, but learning another way to think about things.
Flora Lewis

IELTS essay TPO37 Because people are busy doing so many different things, they do very few things well. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
417 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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