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TPO 50 - do you disagree with the statement or agree? all the university students should require to take history courses no matter what their field is. use specific reasons and examples to support your answer v.1

TPO 50 - do you disagree with the statement or agree? all the university students should require to take history courses no matter what their field is. use specific reasons and examples to support your answer v. 1
By and large, beyond doubt, it is established that knowing about the country or other important events in the past has so many benefits for us. But some, including I, think it strongly depends on the student to be interested in the history or not. Therefor making the history a procrustean course, I believe will follow with lots of arguments. In the following, I will delve into some of the conspicuous reasons to substantiate my point of view on this issue. The first exquisite point to be mentioned is that imposing convictions to people has always been followed by the influences in contrast with what we expect. University is a level of education that students are able to follow their interests there should not be a force for spending time and effort on fields that students don' t have any desire to have information about. In addition, I want to include my own experience, in my country, it is a force that all students from all the majors should take some courses about the history, and some fields about religious and so on. Due to the courses being imposed, I utterly hate them and have never been listening to the teachers. I can confidently say that near 890% of the students are the same as I. The other subtle point to be mentioned is that not all of the students have foundings and scholarships, most of them pay heavy tuitions for the university and making their burden heavier with such courses that are no use for them doesn' t look like an appropriate scheme. Furthermore, the money university spends for gathering the amenities a class requires is a cost that is waste. By the amenities I mean human resources to schedule the class, a professor to teach the course and some resources to clean the class weekly for students. Although spending these resources for other projects in the university will bring up and followed with more satisfaction from the students. For instance, building some yards or changing the old materials that are being used and alternating them with the better functional ones. Last reason that worth some words here is that, sometimes when people are forces o unfavorable things scientific research claim that they show some insulting behaviors toward the people who had made the decision or the others we think are the reason of that misery. Hence, the university and the professors should be expecting some inappropriate and dire behavior from students. Personally talking there always have been some students in our history classes that had issues with the teacher which has been uncomfortable for both the teacher and the other students. Due the aforementioned ground, the policy of making students care about the unnecessary convictions of people in past is not the adequate scheme if the goal is that students know about the latter eras. To put in briefly, contemplating from all the factors and the reasons I believe taking history courses should be an option for the ones that aspire to know about it not a force for all of the students.
By and large, beyond doubt, it
is established
that knowing about the country or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
in the past has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
benefits for us.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
, including I,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
it
strongly
depends on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
to
be interested
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
or not. Therefor making the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
a
Possible spelling mistake found.
procrustean
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
course
, I believe will follow with lots of arguments. In the following, I will delve into
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
some of the
conspicuous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
to substantiate my point of view on this issue.

The
first
exquisite point to
be mentioned
is that imposing convictions to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
has
always
been followed
by the influences
in contrast
with what we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expect
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
University
is a level of education that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
are able to follow their interests there should not be a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
force
for spending time and effort on fields that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
Possible spelling mistake found.
don&
#039; t have any desire to have information about.
In addition
, I want to include my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
experience, in my country, it is a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
force
that all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
from all the majors should take
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
courses
about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
fields about religious and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on. Due to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
courses
being imposed
, I
utterly
hate them and have never been listening to the teachers. I can
confidently
say that near 890% of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
are the same as I.

The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
subtle point to
be mentioned
is that not
Consider using "all the".
all of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
have
Possible spelling mistake found.
foundings
and scholarships, most of them pay heavy
Possible spelling mistake found.
tuitions
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
and making their burden heavier with such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
courses
that are no
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
for them
Possible spelling mistake found.
doesn&
#039; t look like an appropriate scheme.
Furthermore
, the money
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
spends for gathering the amenities a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
requires is a cost
that is
waste. By the amenities I mean human resources to schedule the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
, a professor to teach the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
course
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
resources to clean the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
weekly for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
. Although spending these resources for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
projects in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
will bring up and followed with more satisfaction from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
.
For instance
, building
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
yards or changing the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
materials that are being
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
and alternating them with the better functional ones.

Last
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
that worth
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
words here is that,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
forces
o unfavorable things scientific research claim that they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
insulting behaviors toward the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who had made the decision or the others we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
are the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
of that misery.
Hence
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
and the professors should be expecting
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
inappropriate and dire behavior from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
.
Personally
talking there always have been
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
in our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classes
that had issues with the teacher which has been uncomfortable for both the teacher and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
students.

It appears that a preposition is missing after 'Due'.
Due the
aforementioned ground, the policy of making
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
care about the unnecessary convictions of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in past is not the adequate scheme if the goal is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
know about the latter eras. To put in
briefly
, contemplating from all the factors and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
I believe taking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
courses
should be an option for the ones that aspire to know about it not a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
force
for
Consider using "all the".
all of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
46Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10Mistakes

IELTS essay TPO 50 - do you disagree with the statement or agree? all the university students should require to take history courses no matter what their field is. use specific reasons and examples to support your answer v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
515 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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