Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

TPO 44 - Question 2Some people believe that primary schools should no longer teach children how to write by hand, and instead should spend time teaching them how to type on a computer. Other people believe that it is still important for schools to teach c v.1

TPO 44 - Question 2Some people believe that primary schools should no longer teach children how to write by hand, and instead should spend time teaching them how to type on a computer. Other people believe that it is still important for schools to teach c v. 1
Many believe that there is a probability to find out about the individuals’ culture and personality with the help of their clothing styles. I completely disagree with this phenomenon. First it will discuss the reasons why one cannot read a person’s culture followed by his or her nature. To begin, until fairly recently, many have started wearing trendy clothes, which makes it hard to tell about their culture. For instance, in this global village there are many multinational schools, colleges and companies trending, therefore, to compete with one another everyone is doing their part of share, while doing so each individual seems to follow global fashion, thus one cannot tell about other’s culture just looking at their clothing. Additionally, not only just in the developing countries, but also in the underdeveloped countries, people seem to wear clothes like Jeans, T-shirt and shorts in rural areas, as it is in the developed countries people like The United States Of America. Moreover, I think, In spite of what some may assume, it is even difficult to know a person’s inner side just by his outer look. Firstly, while reading a person’s character, if it is good or bad, just clothes cannot say that alone. For example, labours working in a factory tend to get dirty clothes, whereas business class people wear neat and clean formal clothes, which surely cannot describe the character of any. Secondly, Does lawyers, doctors and army professionals have the same character as they dress similarly according to their profession? Thus, it is impossible to guess anybody’s personality with their dress code. In Conclusion, there are people, who think that they can read people’s culture and personality, however, I think, it is difficult to do so with just an outer appearance.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
believe that there is a probability to find out about the individuals’
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
and personality with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of their clothing styles. I completely disagree with this phenomenon.
First
it will discuss the reasons why one cannot read a person’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
followed by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
his or her
nature.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
, until
fairly
recently,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
wearing trendy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tell
about their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
.
For instance
, in this global village there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
multinational schools, colleges and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
trending,
therefore
, to compete with one another everyone is doing their part of share, while doing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
each individual seems to follow global fashion,
thus
one cannot
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tell
about other’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
looking at their clothing.
Additionally
, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developing countries
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
in the underdeveloped countries,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
seem to wear
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
like Jeans, T-shirt and shorts in rural areas, as it is in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developed countries
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
like The
If the term is a proper noun, use the suggested capitalization.
United States Of America
.

Moreover
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
In spite of
what
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
may assume, it is even difficult to know a person’s inner side
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
by his outer look.
Firstly
, while reading a person’s character, if it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
cannot say that alone.
For example
,
Possible spelling mistake. 'labours' is British English.
labours
working in a factory tend to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
dirty
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
, whereas business
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
wear neat and clean formal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
, which
surely
cannot
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
describe
the character of any.
Secondly
, Does lawyers, doctors and army professionals have the same character as they dress
similarly
according to their profession?
Thus
, it is impossible to guess anybody’s personality with their dress code.

In Conclusion
, there are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that they can read
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
and personality,
however
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
, it is difficult to do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
an outer appearance.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay TPO 44 - Question 2Some people believe that primary schools should no longer teach children how to write by hand, and instead should spend time teaching them how to type on a computer. Other people believe that it is still important for schools to teach c v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
292 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts