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tpo 27-3The woman expresses her opinion about the university’s plan. Briefly summarize the plan, then state her opinion and explain the reasons she gives for holding that opinion. v.1

tpo 27-3The woman expresses her opinion about the university’s plan. Briefly summarize the plan, then state her opinion and explain the reasons she gives for holding that opinion. v. 1
Some people see the government effort to promote the arts as a misuse of money which could be better invested in other sectors of society. However, this essay, disagreeing with this belief, is going to clarify the role of the arts in our society and explain why they deserve to be funded. Superficially, Art can be seen as an insignificant accessory in living. It is difficult for many to value art, especially If they compare it to other primary human needs such as alimentation and shelter. For example, a study shows that 85% of parents in the USA, believing that Art does not make a living, would be against their children pursuing a career in this field. In short, the arts are considered as futility only consumed by a tiny privileged elite. Despite the underestimation of the arts, they play a significant role in society. Human beings either create or obtain a work of art not only to decorate their spaces but also to gain some balance in their lives. By surrounding themselves of art, they try to avoid sadness. For instance, Imagine the World, with all its conflicts and wars, without any beautiful piece of art to compensate all crudeness we have been exposed. Indeed, life would be a tragedy in the absence of art. In conclusion, this essay argued that the view that the arts are not an asset in society is completely flawed. Humans need the beauty of art to strive. For this reason, the Governments, which are responsible for looking after their citizens' interests, must subsidise the arts to make them available to everybod
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
effort to promote the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
as a misuse of money which could be better invested in other sectors of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
.
However
, this essay, disagreeing with this belief, is going to clarify the role of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
in our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
why they deserve to
be funded
.

Superficially
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Art
can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
as an insignificant accessory in living. It is difficult for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
to value
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
,
especially
If they compare it to other primary human needs such as alimentation and shelter.
For example
, a study
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
that 85% of parents in the USA, believing that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Art
does not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a living, would be against their children pursuing a career in this field. In short, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
are considered
as futility
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
consumed by a tiny privileged elite.

Despite the underestimation of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
, they play a significant role in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
. Human beings either create or obtain a work of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
to decorate their spaces
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
to gain
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
balance in their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
. By surrounding themselves of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
, they try to avoid sadness.
For instance
, Imagine the World, with all its conflicts and wars, without any
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
piece of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
to compensate all crudeness we have
been exposed
.
Indeed
, life would be a tragedy in the absence of art.

In conclusion
, this essay argued that the view that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
are not an asset in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
is completely flawed. Humans need the beauty of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
to strive.
For this reason
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Governments
, which are responsible for looking after their citizens' interests,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
Possible spelling mistake. 'subsidise' is British English.
subsidise
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them available to
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
everybod
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay tpo 27-3The woman expresses her opinion about the university’s plan. Briefly summarize the plan, then state her opinion and explain the reasons she gives for holding that opinion. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
267 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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