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TPO 21 – taks 2: Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? For success in a future job, the ability to relate with other people is more important than studying hard in school. v.1

TPO 21 – taks 2: For success in a future job, the ability to relate with other people is more important than studying hard in school. v. 1
Nowadays, there is a huge concern about the environment as people have started realizing the negative impact of their actions on the planet. Plastic pollution is one of such issues which need to be dealt with quickly and effectively. According to some people, supermarkets should help to improve the situation by reducing the amount of packaging they use. Others insist that it is the duty of consumers to stay away from over-packaged products. Both views will be discussed in this essay. One the one hand, it is evident that supermarkets and manufacturers are the prime producers and promoters of the consumer goods; therefore they are the roots of this problem and by applying simple regulations over the manufacturing process, they can decrease the amount of packaging efficiently. Take milk bottles, for example. If supermarkets made them thinner or even replaced them with carton bottles, they would have a tremendous impact on the amount of plastic consumed. Thus, the argument that supermarkets should take responsibility to reduce overpackaging certainly makes sense. On the other hand, satisfying people’s demands is the main job of the manufacturer. This means that the more people continue to purchase packaged products, the more they are produced. By contract, if people decided to cut their consumption of such products, there would be a definite reduction in their production. For instance, two years ago the government in the UK imposed a price on plastic bags in large supermarkets. This action decreased their consumption as well as production. Thus, consumers have a key role to play in tackling this issue. In conclusion, I believe that collaborative efforts should be taken by both the manufacturers and consumers to reduce pollution caused by excessive packaging.
Nowadays, there is a huge concern about the environment as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
realizing the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impact of their actions on the planet. Plastic pollution is one of such issues which need to
be dealt
with
quickly
and
effectively
. According to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, supermarkets should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the situation by reducing the amount of packaging they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
. Others insist that it is the duty of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
consumers
to stay away from over-packaged products. Both views will
be discussed
in this essay.

Did you mean "on"?
One
the one hand, it is evident that supermarkets and manufacturers are the prime producers and promoters of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
consumer
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
;
therefore
they are the roots of this problem and by applying simple regulations over the manufacturing process, they can decrease the amount of packaging
efficiently
. Take milk bottles,
for example
. If supermarkets made them thinner or even replaced them with carton bottles, they would have a tremendous impact on the amount of plastic consumed.
Thus
, the argument that supermarkets should take responsibility to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
Possible spelling mistake found.
overpackaging
certainly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
sense.

On the other hand
, satisfying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
demands is the main job of the manufacturer. This means that the more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
continue to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
packaged products, the more they
are produced
. By contract, if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
decided to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cut
their consumption of such products, there would be a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
definite
reduction in their production.
For instance
, two years ago the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
in the UK imposed a price on plastic bags in large supermarkets. This action decreased their consumption
as well
as production.
Thus
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
consumers
have a key role to play in tackling this issue.

In conclusion
, I believe that collaborative efforts should
be taken
by both the manufacturers and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
consumers
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
pollution caused by excessive packaging.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay TPO 21 – taks 2: For success in a future job, the ability to relate with other people is more important than studying hard in school. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
282 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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