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TPO-17: Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Most advertisements make products seem much better than they really are. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v.1

TPO-17: Most advertisements make products seem much better than they really are. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v. 1
Fashion is tend to be one of the most trending aspects of life these days. During the last century, the styles we dress rapidly changed. In the past, no one had imagined that people will wear, the form we are dressing currently. Taking a closer look into different regions from all over the world, for instance, in Europe; people used to wear in a certain way, on the other hand, currently we can see a wide range of dressing taste. Some people argued that the trend has a negative effect on our lives. There are many reasons behind this claim. Such as, setting the bar of affording clothes very high. Also, spending much money to keep up with the new trending lines. Lastly, the bad taste of fashion, due to the flashy colours and the unusual styles. Another team has a totally different point of view, they support the idea that appearance has an added value in a positive add to our daily lives. This party has his own evidences, such as, raising the importance of using art in our manner of dressing. Adding to that, the ability of having an alternative to the out-dated customs. Last but not least, giving the fashion makers a better means of making a living. In conclusion, from my point of view, I support the idea that; Pattern has a great positive impact on our lives. Firstly, look is an important element in raising our taste of clothing. Secondly, It gives us a variety of options for clothes we might wear. Lastly, boldness of ideas that artists use in style nowadays, is a great way of expressing our inner thoughts.
Fashion is
Consider using a past participle here: "tended".
tend
to be one of the most trending aspects of life these days. During the last century, the styles we dress
rapidly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
. In the past, no one had imagined that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
will wear, the form we are dressing
currently
. Taking a closer look into
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
regions from all over the world,
for instance
, in Europe;
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to wear in a certain way,
on the other hand
,
currently
we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
a wide range of dressing taste.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
argued that the trend has a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effect on our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
. There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
reasons behind this claim. Such as, setting the bar of affording clothes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
high.
Also
, spending much money to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
up with the new trending lines.
Lastly
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
taste of fashion, due to the flashy
Possible spelling mistake. 'colours' is British English.
colours
and the unusual styles.

Another team has a
totally
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
point of view, they support the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
that appearance has an
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
added
value in a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
add
to our daily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
. This party has his
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
evidences, such as, raising the importance of using art in our manner of dressing. Adding to that, the ability of having an alternative to the out-dated customs. Last
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not least, giving the fashion makers a better means of making a living.

In conclusion
, from my point of view, I support the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
that; Pattern has a great
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
impact on our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.
Firstly
, look is an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
element in raising our taste of clothing.
Secondly
, It gives us a variety of options for clothes we might wear.
Lastly
, boldness of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
that artists
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
in style nowadays, is a great way of expressing our inner thoughts.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
The limits of my language mean the limits of my world.
Ludwig Wittgenstein

IELTS essay TPO-17: Most advertisements make products seem much better than they really are. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
276 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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