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TPO-14 - Independent Writing Task Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? People benefit more from traveling in their own country than from traveling to foreign countries. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v.2

TPO-14 - Independent Writing Task People benefit more from traveling in their own country than from traveling to foreign countries. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v. 2
Without a shadow of the doubt, travaling and spending time to go to different places play a vital role in the having a happy family. By going to travel we can let our family experience new things. Many people contend that human benefit more from traveling in their own country, while others assert traveling to foreign countries is a better idea. However, my personal experience and actual observation of life have led me to agree that people benefit more from traveling to abroad. In the ensuing lines, I delve into my reasons to substantiate my point. The first and possibly the paramount reason is that by going to a new country we can meat newpeople and new places. Consequently, we can learn about the history of the country and understand their culture. If we limit ourselves just to our home country, we may lose our chances to broaden our horizon. Furthermore, we can use from our new experiences in our personal lives. For example, last year I visited Istanbul city in Turkey. This city was very amazing, beautiful and full of tourists. One thing that impressed me very much was about planting flowers and trees in front of their houses. These green and colorful flowers had made the city pleasant. After I come back to my country, I plant some flowers to increase the beauty of my home. Eventully, I believe that traveling to foreign countries can benefit more in comparison with traveling in oyr countri. Another point springing to mind is that by experiencing new places we can make new friends in all over the world. Actuaaay, by remaining just in our country we limit ourselves, but by going to other part of the world and knowing other people we can increase our chance to make friendship with new people. If we meat new people we can show our culture to them. So, there is a possibility that they come to our country and visit different places. Besides, by absorbing tourists in our country we can make money. In this way, our country have to build new hotels and airports and different places. So, people can occupy these new jobs. As you can see, by making friends and inviting them to our country we can make money. To sum it all up, it is easy to see the advantages of traveling to different countries. Believe it or not, there are many benefits such as learning about their culture and their good habitats and using them in our real life, or making new friends that by default can lead to make money in our country. Traveling to new country is not only an amazing experience but also a good adventure. Finally, I hope someday all of us can visit all the countries that we like to go.
Without a shadow of the doubt,
Possible spelling mistake found.
travaling
and spending time to go to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
play a vital role in the having a happy family. By going to travel we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
our family
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
things.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
contend that human
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
benefit
more from traveling in their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
, while others assert traveling to foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
is a better
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
.
However
, my personal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
and actual observation of life have led me to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
benefit
more from traveling to abroad. In the ensuing lines, I delve into my reasons to substantiate my point.

The
first
and
possibly
the paramount reason is that by going to a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
we
The word 'meat' is a noun or an adjective. A verb or adverb is missing or misspelled here, or maybe a comma is missing.
can meat
Possible spelling mistake found.
newpeople
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
.
Consequently
, we can learn about the history of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
and understand their culture. If we limit ourselves
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
to our home
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
, we may lose our chances to broaden our horizon.
Furthermore
, we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
from our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experiences
in our personal
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.
For example
, last year I visited Istanbul city in Turkey. This city was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
amazing,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
and full of tourists. One thing that impressed me
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
much was about planting flowers and trees in front of their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
. These green and colorful flowers had made the city pleasant. After I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
back to my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
, I plant
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
flowers to increase the beauty of my home.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Eventully
, I believe that traveling to foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
benefit
more
in comparison
with traveling in
Possible spelling mistake found.
oyr
Possible spelling mistake found.
countri
.

Another point springing to mind is that by experiencing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
we can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
friends in all over the world.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Actuaaay
, by remaining
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
in our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
we limit ourselves,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
by going to other part of the world and knowing other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
we can increase our chance to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
friendship with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
“If” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
If
Do not use a noun immediately after the pronoun 'we'. Use a verb or an adverb, or possibly some other part of speech.
we meat
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
our culture to them.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, there is a possibility that they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
to our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
and visit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
.
Besides
, by absorbing tourists in our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
we can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
money. In this way, our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
build
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
hotels and airports and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can occupy these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
jobs. As you can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
, by making friends and inviting them to our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
we can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
money.

To sum it all up, it is easy to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
the advantages of traveling to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
. Believe it or not, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
benefits
such as learning about their culture and their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
habitats and using them in our real life, or making
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
friends that by default can lead to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
money in our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
. Traveling to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
an amazing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
adventure.
Finally
, I hope someday all of us can visit all the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
that we like to go.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
56Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9Mistakes

IELTS essay TPO-14 - Independent Writing Task People benefit more from traveling in their own country than from traveling to foreign countries. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
467 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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