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TPO-14 - Independent Writing Task Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? People benefit more from traveling in their own country than from traveling to foreign countries. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v.1

TPO-14 - Independent Writing Task People benefit more from traveling in their own country than from traveling to foreign countries. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v. 1
Capital punishment is believed to provide security to people since ancient times. Masses possess the notion that its implementation is crucial for the maintenance of peace in society. This will discuss why the applicability of the death penalty is extremely important. To begin with, many believe that the advent of technology has increased the crime at an alarming rate, particularly in developing countries. For instance, every two minutes a girl is getting raped and every second day a murder case is published in the newspaper. Consequently, capital punishment can only halt the crime rate. Moreover, due to security concern, many folks are moving to developed countries where criminals are not exempted for murder and rape. To illustrate, people of India believe that western countries are secure from a security perspective. Thus, the only way to curb the problem is capital punishment by legal law authorities. On the other hand, some masses think that the death penalty is no less than cruelty. Their perspective is that a life sentence to the criminals can do equal good to society. Stringent laws, for example, no bail, if the alleged is found guilty than court should announce the verdict within two days. Furthermore, moral ethics does not allow anyone to kill the person. Therefore, crime can be controlled if a criminal is put in prison for the rest of their whole life. To conclude, capital punishment is considered a tool to establish peace in the society. This essay discussed why it is important to put a criminal to death including, the rising crime rate and migration of people to secure countries, despite being morally illegal.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Capital
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
is believed
to provide security to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
since ancient times. Masses possess the notion that its implementation is crucial for the maintenance of peace in society. This will discuss why the applicability of the death penalty is
extremely
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
believe that the advent of technology has increased the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
at an alarming rate,
particularly
in developing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
.
For instance
, every two minutes a girl is getting raped and every second day a murder case
is published
in the newspaper.
Consequently
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
capital
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
halt the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
rate.
Moreover
, due to security concern,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
folks are moving to developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminals
are not exempted for murder and rape. To illustrate,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
of India believe that western
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
are secure from a security perspective.
Thus
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
way to curb the problem is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
capital
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
by legal law authorities.

On the other hand
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
masses
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that the death penalty is no less than cruelty. Their perspective is that a life sentence to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminals
can do equal
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
to society. Stringent laws,
for example
, no bail, if the alleged
is found
Use "guiltier" to make a comparison with this adjective.
guilty
than court should announce the verdict within two days.
Furthermore
, moral ethics does not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
anyone to kill the person.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
can
be controlled
if a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminal
is put
in prison for the rest of their whole life.

To conclude
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
capital
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
is considered
a tool to establish peace in the society. This essay discussed why it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to put a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminal
to death including, the rising
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
rate and migration of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to secure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
, despite being
morally
illegal.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay TPO-14 - Independent Writing Task People benefit more from traveling in their own country than from traveling to foreign countries. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
271 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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