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TOPIC 1: Some people think that it is more effective for students in studying in groups, while others believe that it is better for them to study alone. Discuss both views and give your opinion v.2

TOPIC 1: Some people think that it is more effective for students in studying in groups, while others believe that it is better for them to study alone. 2
Some students tend to gather in groups for studying which they can feel highly productive but the other ones can make an impressive result when they study themselves. From my personal view, both methods have their own advantages but I do believe that personal studying is probably more useful. In general, there are some beneficial aspects that may be found in studying among many students. Firstly, when they share and discuss ideas, thoughts or any other problems with their friends, they can probably improve their social skills. Secondly, through discussing different subjects, they can apparently learn from their own friends and find out more solutions for their issues which can widen their options before they make any decisions. However, studying in person is also appropriate for a number of learners. Certainly, some students are easily distracted by surrounding environment. They get carried away usually by noises and people and that is the reason why they can only focus when they are alone. On the other hand, without communication, they can avoid arguments with others during interacting process so they could be more stable with their intention. Furthermore, they do not have to wait anyone and can control their own organization way in studying. In other words, they are completely independent and totally pay attention on their works. To conclude, both learning methods are generally used among students and have their own benefits but I suppose that personal studying sounds more effectively.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
tend to gather in groups for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studying
which they can feel
highly
productive
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
ones can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
an impressive result when they study themselves. From my personal view, both methods have their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
advantages
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I do believe that personal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studying
is
probably
more useful.

In general
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
beneficial aspects that may
be found
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studying
among
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
.
Firstly
, when they share and discuss
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
, thoughts or any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
problems with their friends, they can
probably
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their social
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
.
Secondly
, through discussing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
subjects, they can
apparently
learn from their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
friends and find out more solutions for their issues which can widen their options
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
any decisions.

However
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studying
in person is
also
appropriate for a number of learners.
Certainly
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
are
easily
distracted by surrounding environment. They
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
carried away
usually
by noises and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
and
that is
the reason why they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
focus when they are alone. On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, without communication, they can avoid arguments with others during interacting process
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they could be more stable with their intention.
Furthermore
, they do not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
wait anyone and can control their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
organization way in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studying
. In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
words, they are completely independent and
totally
pay attention on their works.

To conclude
, both learning methods are
generally
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
and have their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
benefits
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I suppose that personal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studying
sounds more
effectively
.
16Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
14Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay TOPIC 1: Some people think that it is more effective for students in studying in groups, while others believe that it is better for them to study alone. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
241 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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