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Too much money is spending on repairing old buildings instead of knocking them down and building new ones To what extent do you agree or disagree v.1

Too much money is spending on repairing old buildings instead of knocking them down and building new ones v. 1
Nowadays in all most all the cities, we can see new buildings with new futuristic designs are built. Some argue that, instead of maintaining an old building, building a new will prevent spending too much money. I agree to the statement and this essay will discuss why it is more relevant to the current time. First of all, while building it new, we can build that building to be future proof by using improved materials and also with the same cost and a design to match the current population demands. Furthermore, it will be more secure and use less space than older buildings. For an example, most of the older buildings like houses have one or two levels above with limited space, while a new building can hold more people in less land space so it will be more efficient. Secondly, comparing to the newest designs, older ones structural integrity is compromised over the years and because of that it is more unsecure. Although there are some old buildings that have more historical values, most of them are taken up more land space than a normal design. Hence it is hard to maintain and repair and needs to spend more money than a new design house. Moreover, comparing to the new buildings, adaptation to the new technology and easy repair will be impossible in cost wise. In conclusion, I agree that instead of spending too much money on renovating old buildings, building new ones will be the better and cost effective solution.
Nowadays in
Did you mean "almost"?
all most
all the cities, we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
futuristic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
designs
are built
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
argue that,
instead
of maintaining an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
spending too much money. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
to the statement and this essay will discuss why it is more relevant to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
time.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
it
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
, we can build that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
to be future proof by using
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
materials and
also
with the same cost and a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
design
to match the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
population demands.
Furthermore
, it will be more secure and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
less
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
space
than older
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
. For an example, most of the older
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
like
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
have one or two levels above with limited
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
space
, while a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
can hold more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in less land
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
space
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it will be more efficient.

Secondly
, comparing to the newest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
designs
, older
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ones
structural integrity
is compromised
over the years and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of that it is more unsecure. Although there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
that have more historical values, most of them
are taken
up more land
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
space
than a normal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
design
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Hence
it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to maintain and repair and needs to spend more money than a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
design
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
.
Moreover
, comparing to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
, adaptation to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
technology and easy repair will be impossible in cost wise.

In conclusion
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that
instead
of spending too much money on renovating
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ones
will be the better and cost effective solution.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
32Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay Too much money is spending on repairing old buildings instead of knocking them down and building new ones v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
252 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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