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Some counties are struggling with an increase in the rate of crime. Many people think that having more police on the streets is the only way to reduce crime. To what extent do you agree? v.2

Some counties are struggling with an increase in the rate of crime. Many people think that having more police on the streets is the only way to reduce crime. v. 2
Nowadays, criminal activity is raising in some countries. Large number of people consider that the only way to combat crime is extension of police force in the town. I somehow agree with the opinion; however, I suppose that this measure may not be enough. On the one side, increasing police patrol on the streets should definitely improve the criminogenic environment. Especially, reducing in rapes, robberies, murders and assault must be expected because offenders as rule escape those places where the crime can be seen by witnesses or where they can be easily caught by the police. In addition, if an attack occurs, the victim will be able to receive help as soon as possible taking in account that security was increased. On the other side, this action may not improve the situation significantly. For this reason, in order to reduce crime in an area, authorities have to imbed cameras on the streets, as well as street lightning should be improved. Apart of that, governments should implement different measures aimed to solve root causes of high crime level in a country. For instance, social programs for the poorest part of population will be a great deal because they will solve daily basis issues of it and hopefully deterrent them against committing an offence. In conclusion, I agree that the growth of offences in some countries can be reduced by extra police force on the streets. Nevertheless, in order to improve crime rates significantly governments should target root causes of crimes and implement social programs in order to mitigate them.
Nowadays, criminal activity is raising in
some
countries. Large number of
people
consider that the
only
way to combat
crime
is extension of
police
force in the town.

I somehow
agree
with the opinion;
however
, I suppose that this measure may not be
enough
.

On the one side, increasing
police
patrol on the
streets
should definitely
improve
the
criminogenic
environment.
Especially
, reducing in rapes, robberies, murders and assault
must
be
expected
because
offenders as
rule
escape those places where the
crime
can be
seen
by witnesses or where they can be
easily
caught by the
police
.
In addition
, if an attack occurs, the victim will be able to receive
help
as
soon
as possible taking in account that security
was increased
.

On the other side, this action may not
improve
the situation
significantly
.
For this reason
, in order to
reduce
crime
in an area, authorities
have to
imbed
cameras on the
streets
,
as well
as
street
lightning should be
improved
.
Apart of
that,
governments
should implement
different
measures aimed to solve root causes of high
crime
level in a country.
For instance
, social programs for the poorest part of population will be a great deal
because
they will solve daily basis issues of it and
hopefully
deterrent them against committing an
offence
.

In conclusion
, I
agree
that the growth of
offences
in
some
countries can be
reduced
by extra
police
force on the
streets
.
Nevertheless
, in order to
improve
crime
rates
significantly
governments
should target root causes of
crimes
and implement social programs in order to mitigate them.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
14Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes

IELTS essay Some counties are struggling with an increase in the rate of crime. Many people think that having more police on the streets is the only way to reduce crime. v. 2

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
258 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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