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Today's weddings are becoming bigger and expensive than it used to be in the past. Why is this happening? Is it positive or negative development? v.1

Today's weddings are becoming bigger and expensive than it used to be in the past. Why is this happening? Is it positive or negative development? v. 1
Wedding ceremonies, nowadays, include large amounts of money and a considerable number of people as compared to the past. Peoples' habit of showing off, in my view, is one of the major reasons behind this trend. The aim of this essay is to explain why the phenomenon of over-budgeted and bigger marriage functions do more harm than good. The prime reason for spending large amounts of money and inviting many people in marriages is showing off. This is because significant number of people believe that they would get admiration in society if bragged about wealth by overspending on such functions. In Punjab, for instance, people prefer to rent marriage palaces, which are generally expensive, instead of making arrangements for weddings at homes. What is more, the larger the number of people is expected to come, larger the arrangement for food and seating will be. Thus, to make marriage functions bigger, sending invitations to all the contacts is not a wise idea, as it further increases the overall budget. The trend of bigger and expensive marriage ceremonies, in my opinion, is a negative development. People belonging to middle class families might feel inferior than wealthy ones because of their inability to spend large amounts of money on marriages. As a result, they prefer taking out loans for those functions and spend many years to pay them off. Another point is, the money which is wasted on weddings can be well saved for other purposes, such as charity to schools and orphanages. In this way, people will not only contribute to a noble cause but will also experience a sense of satisfaction in them by helping the needy ones. Therefore, it is better to have smaller and less budgeted weddings. In conclusion, while people try to brag about their wealth and contacts, I believe that it is of no use as it may develop a sense of inferiority amongst poor people. Besides this, if people do charity with that money, the world will become a better place for those who really needs it.
Wedding ceremonies, nowadays, include large amounts of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
and a considerable number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
as compared to the past. Peoples' habit of showing off, in my view, is one of the major reasons behind this trend. The aim of this essay is to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
why the phenomenon of over-budgeted and bigger
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
marriage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
functions
do more harm than
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
.

The prime reason for spending large amounts of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
and inviting
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
marriages
is showing off. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
significant number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that they would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
admiration in society if bragged about wealth by overspending on such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
functions
. In Punjab,
for instance
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
prefer to rent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
marriage
palaces, which are
generally
expensive,
instead
of making arrangements for weddings at homes.
What is more
, the larger the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expected
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
, larger the arrangement for food and seating will be.
Thus
, to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
marriage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
functions
bigger, sending invitations to all the contacts is not a wise
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
, as it
further
increases the
overall
budget.

The trend of bigger and expensive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
marriage
ceremonies, in my opinion, is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
development.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
belonging to middle
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
families might feel
Some adjectives derived from Latin act as both adjective and comparative. In these cases use the collocation 'to'
inferior than
wealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ones
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of their inability to spend large amounts of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
marriages
.
As a result
, they prefer taking out loans for those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
functions
and spend
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
years to pay them off. Another point is, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
which
is wasted
on weddings can be well saved for other purposes, such as charity to schools and orphanages. In this way,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
contribute to a noble cause
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
will
also
experience a sense of satisfaction in them by helping the needy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ones
.
Therefore
, it is better to have smaller and less budgeted weddings.

In conclusion
, while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
try to brag about their wealth and contacts, I believe that it is of no
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
as it may develop a sense of inferiority amongst poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
Besides
this, if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do charity with that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
, the world will become a better place for those who
really
needs it.
15Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
27Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay Today's weddings are becoming bigger and expensive than it used to be in the past. Why is this happening? Is it positive or negative development? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
341 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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