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Today, some employees are not sociable with colleagues in their team. What are reasons of this and what measure can be suggested? v.1

Today, some employees are not sociable with colleagues in their team. What are reasons of this and what measure can be suggested? v. 1
It is often argued that electrical devices are becoming a significant part of our educational life. In the next phrases I will discuss the positive and negative impacts of this development. First of all, there is a significant decrease in the paper usage over the years, which is a lot better for the protecting of the trees and it is also effective by putting the numbers down on the garbage in the public roads. The reason for this is that most of the homework or other school projects are provided electronically these days. For instance, research has shown that the Word documents have experienced an upward trend in their numbers. So with this progress, our nature can be saved from destruction, which was a huge percentage in the last 20 years. Nevertheless, this approach also got their own disadvantages. Revising with computers makes it difficult to concentrate on your study. The fundamental reason for this is that a lot of pupils find it attractive to watch video's and go on Facebook or twitter instead of working. For example, young teenagers are more into the social media these days. So, students have to be hard for them to get a higher rate on their marks. To summarize, although digital devices can be necessary in school lessons, I believe that this effect got their disadvantages because it attract offsprings from their revision and it makes it harder to focus. Finally, it can be effective in another way by protecting the earth and from dirt and destroying.
It is
often
argued that electrical devices are becoming a significant part of our educational life. In the
next
phrases I will discuss the
positive
and
negative
impacts of this development.

First of all
, there is a significant decrease in the paper usage over the years, which is a lot better for the protecting of the trees and it is
also
effective by putting the numbers down on the garbage in the public roads.
The reason for this is
that most of the homework or other school projects
are provided
electronically
these days.
For instance
, research has shown that the Word documents have experienced an upward trend in their numbers.
So
with this progress, our nature can
be saved
from destruction, which was a huge percentage in the last 20 years.

Nevertheless
, this approach
also
got
their
own
disadvantages. Revising with computers
makes
it difficult to concentrate on your study. The fundamental reason for this is that
a lot of
pupils find it attractive to
watch
video's and go on Facebook or twitter
instead
of working.
For example
, young
teenagers
are more into the social media these days.

So
, students
have to
be
hard
for them to
get
a higher rate on their marks.

To summarize
, although digital devices can be necessary in school lessons, I believe that this effect
got
their disadvantages
because
it
attract
offsprings
from their revision and it
makes
it harder to focus.

Finally
, it can be effective in another way by protecting the earth and from dirt and destroying.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Today, some employees are not sociable with colleagues in their team. What are reasons of this and what measure can be suggested? v. 1

Essay
  American English
6 paragraphs
254 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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