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Today more people are travelling than ever before. Why is this the case? What are the benefits of travelling for the traveller. v.16

Today more people are travelling than ever before. Why is this the case? What are the benefits of travelling for the traveller. v. 16
Travelling these days is very important as about 70% of our population spend their life in the office or working. The human body needs some moment for relaxation as well, so that it can refresh the mind of an individual. It also supports tourism and we often get the chance to meet new people of different regions. To reduce the stress from our daily growth, we need some space alone or with the family to visit different places across the world so that a person can relax and enjoy the soul. Due to certain tensions in the growth, we get tired of the soul and to remove that tension, we prefer roaming the world. For people who love travelling, is the best option to spend their holidays in the most amazing countries such as Thailand, Canada, United States of America, etc. This not only reduces daily growing tensions, but, also improves our mind and have better ideas for loving the heart. Now-a-days people prefer jobs where they need to travel to different countries for some meetings or presentations so that they can keep learning new things in their activity and explore the world as well. In conclusion, everyone should visit a new city at least once in a year to explore new things in the heart. It gives you great experiences which helps you to fight with the problems. Spending some pace outside your local city will give you many things to learn and improve the quality of activity. Interacting with new people of different country will help you in your communication skills.
Travelling these days is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
as about 70% of our population spend their life in the office or working. The human body needs
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
moment for relaxation
as well
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that it can refresh the mind of an individual. It
also
supports
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
tourism and
we
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the chance to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
regions.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
from our daily growth, we need
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
space alone or with the family to visit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
places across the world
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that a person can relax and enjoy the soul. Due to certain tensions in the growth, we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
tired of the soul and to remove that tension, we prefer roaming the world.

For
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
travelling, is the best option to spend their holidays in the most amazing countries such as Thailand, Canada, United States of America, etc. This not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduces
daily growing tensions,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
,
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improves
our mind and have better
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
for loving the heart.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Now
-a-days
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
prefer jobs where they need to travel to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
countries for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
meetings or presentations
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
learning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
things in their activity and explore the world
as well
.

In conclusion
, everyone should visit a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
city at least once in a year to explore
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
things in the heart. It gives you great experiences which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
you to fight with the problems. Spending
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
pace outside your local city will give you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
things to learn and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the quality of activity. Interacting with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
country will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
you in your communication
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
.
6Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
13Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
Knowledge of languages is the doorway to wisdom.
Roger Bacon

IELTS essay Today more people are travelling than ever before. Why is this the case? What are the benefits of travelling for the traveller. v. 16

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
263 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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